My face flushes. I can’t think of my job without thinking of Declan. I think of him constantly. Retreating behind my cider, I give myself a moment before responding.
I think of the heat in his eyes while that demonstration was happening on Thursday night. He wouldn’t answer me when I asked him if that was what he liked—the whips and the ropes. Pain and pleasure. He didn’t have to answer for me to see the truth. I was honest with him too. I don’t know if I would want things to be so … public. It seems dirty to even imagine, but I can’t help it. I have imagined it.
That’s what makes the kiss so complicated. It’s not just a kiss, it’s an invitation. I have some idea of what might have happened if I’d followed him last night, and not retreated back upstairs. He’s not a man with vanilla tastes. You need to stop before something bad happens to you, Braelynn.
Bad as in … getting whipped? Bad as in getting hurt? Plenty of bad things have happened to me in my life, but the women on that stage didn’t seem to think it was bad.
And if I know anything about Declan’s club, it’s that they gave consent. No one goes down to the lower floor if they don’t want to. No one would be up on that stage if they didn’t want to be there.
Or maybe he just meant that if I kept tempting him, I’d end up with him.
My glass clunks as I set it down on the iron a little too hard. “It’s going well. I barely ever have a chance to sit, it’s so busy.”
“I’d like to come visit you at work,” my mom mentions.
That stops my imagination in its tracks. “Oh, I don’t know, Mama.”
“What?” She laughs, her eyes lighting up. “I thought you were a waitress. You can help me find something on the menu to order, right?”
“It’s a nightclub.” I lift a brow and shrug, hoping she’ll understand. “My dresses are a little short.”
And depending on when my mother came to visit … I don’t want to have to explain why some of the women are wearing red, and for what. She’s observant. She’d notice.
She reaches for my hand and pats it. “Well, you know I don’t judge. If it makes you happy, then I’ll support you.” Her little smirk tells me she knows more than I think she knows.
I head off whatever she’s thinking and say, “It’s not for better tips.”
“I’ve been around the block a time or two, you know.”
“Mama,” I say with a gasp and a smile lights up my face. As she chuckles, I join her.
“You do what you have to do. A little skin, a little flirting for a better tip. I get it.” She talks as she eats her salad. “You know your grandmother was a waitress all her life.”
“I didn’t know that.”
My mother nods and says, “She got me my first job as a waitress in the cafe.”
As my mother tells me stories I’ve never heard about my abuela, my mind drifts.
It goes straight back to Declan.
How his lips tasted. How his body felt against mine. The rumble of his voice when he whispered at the shell of my ear.
He’s not a boy anymore, and I felt a certain amount of fear at being downstairs with him. And … I wanted it. I know how risky it is to be involved with any of the Cross brothers. They’re dangerous men and powerful here in the city. I would never want to go up against them, never want to give them a reason to think negatively of me. What I want is deeper than that, I think. The memory of Declan kissing me is enough to send heat rushing to my cheeks and warmth all through me.
I haven’t felt like this since I can remember.
Declan
Scrolling through my phone, I click over to the messages from this morning.
Declan: I’m delighted to hear you didn’t resign.
Braelynn: Declan?
Declan: Yes. Come to my office when you get here.
* * *
My thumb taps impatiently on the edge of my phone. Last night sealed her fate. I’ll be keeping her close. As close as she’d like to get. If that’s her intention, to spy on me for Scarlet, or to dig around, there’s only one way to know.
My gaze moves to the time. 1:01. Just as irritation grows from the fact that she’s already late, there’s a knock on the office door. It’s firm, and comes in a quick set of three.
Knock, knock, knock.
“Come in,” I answer, my body tightening. Everything feels tense and every muscle coiled.
The way I’m going to play with this woman, to tease her and use her … I barely fucking slept last night. My cock’s already hard as the door opens and her small frame is shown.