"That sounds amazing."
He calls out to his buddy, Jake, who jogs on over. "Hey, can you close up the corral after us?"
"Sure thing, boss." He gives Ledger a salute, and I don't know what that's about. I thought those two had the same job. Soon enough, we're on a trail and Ledger lets go of my hand so we can each focus on the path.
There's a slight breeze that I appreciate as we begin to wind down the trail, and I'm thankful that the path is wide, even, and smooth. I want to focus on the sound of the hooves against the dirt path, the birds chirping, and the water rushing by in the creek to our right. But all I hear is my heart – pounding fast, the panic rising for what I don't have. Chestnut.
Ledger must notice because he looks over and tells me it's okay.
"Hey. Hey, Liv," he says. "I got you." And just like that, he has my hand again.
This time he covers his with mine on top of the horn on my saddle. Both of our horses pause, and I swear they're stopping to nuzzle noses.
And then just like that, Ledger and I are nuzzling noses too. Well, kissing, really.
His mouth is on mine. My panic fades, and it's replaced by bliss, by beauty, by this moment that I wasn't expecting.
I'm next to a cowboy who is tempting me in ways that I am not prepared for, my body is not prepared for, my heart is not prepared for.
I sink into the moment because it's all that I can do. Sure, I'm scared. I'm scared of what it means to truly say goodbye to Chestnut. I'm scared of what it means to say hello to Ledger. I'm scared of what my unknown future might be. Because what will it be like to compete without the horse I love by my side, and what would it be like to give my heart over to a cowboy I just met?
I don't know. I don't have the answers.
But this kiss? ...It tells me maybe I don't need them all right now. Maybe all I need right now is this, to lean into the moment.
Ledger pulls away first, and his eyes are on mine. And I feel like he knows I have a thousand questions on the tip of my tongue.
"What kind of magic was that?"
I laugh because that's not the kind of question I was expecting.
And he laughs too. "Damn, Livingston. I'm falling for you, girl."
"Is that a good thing?" I ask this cowboy.
He nods, "More than good. I think you’re what I’ve been waiting for my whole damn life."
5
Ledger
One kiss and damn, I know that I need more. So does she, but underneath us the horses whinny, telling us it’s time to keep on moving.
Liv's eyes are bright, and I'm glad that there aren't tears in them anymore, not like yesterday when she was underneath the willow tree, her phone in her hand, a phone call from a friend making her blue eyes even bluer.
"Was that okay?" I ask.
She nods. "It was perfect."
I grin. "That's what I like to hear," I say. I squeeze her waist and she giggles.
"Okay then," she says, laughing. "Giddy up." The way she says it has me laughing hard, and she tosses back her head, laughing too.
The horses take it as a signal that they should start to trot, and I think for a second that Liv might panic, but she holds on tight, and I tell her to pull back the reins. "Sonny, Cher, you two best behave yourselves." The quarter horses are good, calm horses, and they do as they're told. They slow right down, and we begin our leisurely walk toward the lake, side by side.
It was the right call getting her away from the ranch, getting her alone, and the kiss seems to have melted any tension that built up between us. Now, I know we're both eager to get to our destination, but we can't exactly increase the speed, not since she's never been on a horse before.
"So," I ask her, "you like coming and staying with your aunt and uncle?"
She nods. "Yeah, I have fond memories of being here in the summer." She tells me, "When I was a kid, I'd come out here a lot and stay with my cousins. My cousin Clara, though, she's at college now. Fall semester just started."
"You're not enrolled anywhere?" I ask her, wondering how she never got on a horse if she came out here as a kid. But I don’t want to push this girl. She seems skittish in ways that make me think she could run. And that’s the last thing I want.
She shakes her head. "No, I haven't applied."
"You want to?"
She shrugs. "I'm not sure yet. My aunt says you went to school."