It’s almost as if Jill is on the same wavelength as me and she can’t take it anymore, she opens up the passenger side window and starts screaming Sadie’s name over and over again at the top of her lungs. But she gets nothing back. It’s too silent, horrifyingly so, and neither of us know what to do. I keep asking myself all the ‘what if?’ questions over and over again in my head.
“This isn’t happening,” Jill suddenly yells to no one out there in the world. “This isn’t real.”
She’s right, none of this is what was supposed to happen tonight. It’s a mess. If only… if only so many different things. But I suppose we can’t change that now. There’s no point in getting wrapped up in what we could have changed. Why the fuck can’t we go back two hours…..just two hours?
Oh God, tears are threatening again. I bite down on my bottom lip hard to keep them inside, because if I open those flood gates now, I don’t think I will be able to close them. Jill is sniffing already on the verge, and I can see her about to break down at any given moment. When she does, she can’t see me weeping like a fucking baby as well. Plus, it will probably give up the fact that I’m really worried now.
I’m really worried that something horrific might have happened to her, and if so, nothing will ever be the same again in the worst way possible. I just feel like Sadie’s life is in danger for some reason.
But I’m trying to keep those soul destroying thoughts at bay, I wont let them get the better of me, even if they are chilling me to the very core.
“What’s that?” Jill sits up straighter and points ahead, alerting me to the red and blue flashing lights that I definitely should have noticed before this moment. “Oh my God, what is that? Do you think that someone called the cops?”
“My mom said that she was going to.” Did I not tell Jill this before? “But I don’t know if she did…”
I stare over the top of my steering wheel, wondering why this doesn’t feel right. I can’t put my finger on it, but it doesn’t seem like these are cops coming to find Sadie. This is something else.
“Oh, it looks like an accident or something.” At least I haven’t been drinking if the police are going to be searching for drunk drivers, but I bet other people at the party drove when they shouldn’t have. “This looks bad.”
I glance in the rear-view mirror, but there is already a line of traffic behind my car. I’m not going to be able to turn around that easily, but I also don’t know what other way I would go, and I don’t want to get stuck when we are still looking for Sadie. Unless Sadie got really lost, which admittedly I am very afraid of, this is the way that she would have walked, so this is where I would find her if she did. I’m seriously hoping this isn’t something too serious, so we won’t be stuck here for ages.
“What do you think it is?” I can see Jill’s nerves in her newly bitten thumb nails. “Something bad has happened. I mean, look at all of those police cars. This has to be something really bad, doesn’t it?”
I stop myself from yelling at Jill that I have the same amount of information as she does. I know she’s nervous and that’s why she’s chatting so much and asking me an insane amount of questions that I’m sure she doesn’t even want answering. I unclip my seat belt and click the door open, breathing in the cold, tension filled air.
“Wait here.” It’s a command, not a request. I love Jill, but this is too much for me and I need a moment to myself. “I’m going to find out what’s going on. See how long we will be stuck here.”
Jill senses how serious I am so she nods in agreement. Thank God, because I am not in the mood for any arguing right now. I just need to get out, breathe and get some answers …
Chapter 7 – Jill
I don’t have a thumb nail left, that’s how worked up I am. I’ve been chewing it like crazy because of the nerves and now I don’t have anything left of it. I feel like Garrett has been gone forever. I don’t really know what how much time has passed since he left me alone inside the car. My brain is shot, but it feels like he’s been gone for too long.
“He told me to stay here,” I remind myself with a deeply shaking voice. “I have to wait.”
But with every passing moment, my heart sinks lower, that intense sense of dread consumes me. I am compelled to get out of the car and find out what it is…