But Carrie was different. She had facets to her character that Veronica had never had. And he loved each one. The businesswoman, the re-emerging doctor, the generous lover, the devoted mother. She was multi-dimensional and complex and he couldn’t bear the thought of living his life without her.
His feelings were so intense that not even her proposal to shut the centre, to tear his heart out, could dampen them. Now he’d opened the floodgates, his love was gushing through his system unabated. Not that admitting it helped. It seemed today, more than ever, their problems were completely insurmountable.
He pulled up a chair and sank into it. Hell—it wasn’t even eight o’clock yet!
Two days passed. Two long, slow, agonising days. Charlie relived their last words over and over. He relived the phone call from his father over and over. Every damning word. Her glib ‘I hope you and Veronica are happy’ rang in his ears.
He wished she’d given him the chance to explain. She hadn’t had the benefit of years of similar conversations with his father. She didn’t know the best way to deal with them was to tune them out. He’d hardly been paying attention for most of it. But his words came back at him repeatedly. His noncommittal replies. His bored tone. His evasive comebacks. None of that inflection, the grimacing, the rolled eyes would have been obvious from the other side of the door. No wonder she thought he was interested in his ex.
Between that and exploring avenues to keep the centre open he’d had plenty on his mind. He rubbed his hands through his hair. He felt like he had after Donny had first stabbed him with the syringe. Powerless. In limbo all over again. His options removed. His freedom denied.
He stood and paced around his desk. No. No more. Hadn’t he decided just last week that he was reclaiming his life? That he wasn’t going to wait around any longer? Carrie had challenged him to get a life and he’d taken her up on that. Was he really going to let circumstances block him again?
It had taken him a long time to build up the centre. To gain the trust of locals and authorities alike. And it had taken him for ever to find his soul mate. And he’d be damned if he was going to give up on either of them without a fight.
Two things he knew for sure. He wanted the centre and he wanted Carrie. The thought of being a father to Dana was completely terrifying, but he knew Carrie’s daughter had wormed her way into his affections, despite his concerns, and he wanted to be a part of her life, too. A part of both of their lives.
OK, Carrie didn’t love him. Yet. And he knew he’d be foolish to push that. That she would need time to be certain of his love for her and Dana. And slow would be good to ease into a relationship with Dana. If they took things slowly, maybe the prospect of being a father wouldn’t be so daunting?
But he had to be let in first. He may have only known her for a short time, but her goodbye had seemed very final to him. He paced a bit more, trying to think of a way to reach out to her.
It came to him a few moments later. Of course. The centre. She was good with figures and she knew the financial state of his workplace much better than he did. Surely she’d be interested in helping him to find a way to make it work? No, scratch that—more than make it work. He wanted to go grander. He wanted the expansion, damn it!
OK—she’d been sent here to do a job. And she’d done it. But was it how she really felt deep down? If he’d been a betting man, he would have wagered against it. Surely, with her own personal journey back to medicine so intimately linked with the centre, she could be persuaded to help?
He picked up the phone and dialled her home number without giving himself time to change her mind. A young woman answered.
‘Hi, you must be Susie. This is Charlie.’
‘Ah, Charlie. Dana talks about you non-stop.’
Charlie smiled. Nice to know he was in one of the Douglas women’s good books. ‘Is Carrie in?’
‘’Fraid not. She and Dana are spending a few days at her mum’s place.’
‘Oh, right…OK, then. If you hear from her, tell her I called.’
Charlie replaced the phone in the cradle. Damn it! What now? He had to see her. It had been two days and he was going mad without her. He rose from his desk and stalked out of his office. The area was deserted and the jukebox was blissfully silent.
He sat in Angela’s chair at the reception desk and opened the bottom drawer, reaching for the phone book. He flipped through the pages until he came to the ‘D’ section then thumbed through, locating Douglases. Carrie had mentioned last weekend the suburb where her parents lived.
Charlie found four Douglases listed and prayed that Carrie’s parents were one of them. He’d grabbed his stuff and locked up the centre. He would visit each address until he found her. He started the Datsun and prayed they didn’t have an unlisted number.