“You were amazing!” I said, squeezing him tight, holding him together. I knew how easily he could be overwhelmed. Bizarrely, though, he’d coped astonishingly well with the stress and unpredictability being on the show brought. The music, somehow, got him through it.
“Ah, I dunno. Thought I lost the rhythm a bit in the chorus.”
I pulled back, looked him in the eye. “You didn’t.” He wouldn’t believe me, but I’d needed to try and assure him anyway. That’s how Hugo and I worked. I had faith in him when he couldn’t have it in himself, which was often. “The whole audience was silent listening to you, completely captivated.”
“I agree.” Marc’s voice surprised me. I hadn’t noticed him approach. Marc was a fellow finalist and had been living in the Next Up mansion with Hugo for the last two months. I kind of thought Hugo fancied Marc, though he hadn’t said. It was obvious sometimes, the way Hugo would stare after him, how his gaze would linger while Marc rehearsed. Hugo didn’t show that level of interest in any other contestant. “You sounded great. What did you think of mine? I don’t think Julia liked it. I’m kinda nervous now.”
“I didn’t listen. I had my own song to worry about,” Hugo said without a second’s hesitation.
I kicked his foot as subtly as I could, a little reminder that, as people, we needed to at least pretend to take an interest in others sometimes. That was another reason Hugo and I made such a great duo. I was gregarious enough to compensate for what others might perceive as Hugo’s selfishness. In truth, he wasn’t selfish. His brain, like a computer, could only deal with one open tab at a time. “You sounded fantastic,” I cut in. “I loved what you did with the track. I’ve never heard it slowed down like that before. It made the lyrics feel really powerful.”
“Yeah?” Marc’s eyes widened, smile grew. “Cheers, Helen.”
When I looked back, Hugo had wandered off to the other side of the room. As I approached, I could see his balled fists, the white knuckles, his fingernails digging into his palms. “Hey,” I said it gently.
“I fucked that up, didn’t I? Marc must think I’m a dick.”
“No one thinks that.” As I said it, I couldn’t say for sure whether it was true. In fact, I was certain some people likely did think Hugo was a dick. Self-centred. Inconsiderate. Rude. Those people didn’t know him. “Especially Marc. He’s your friend.”
Hugo’s eyes drooped a little, disappointed. Even that showed me he wished he and Marc were more than friends. Unfortunately, Marc was screwing Jenny, another contestant who got sent home three weeks ago. “I don’t know how you do it, how you know what to say all the time.”
I thought about it for a moment, but I didn’t have an answer.
“Can you imagine if I win this thing?” Hugo continued. “Jesus, Heli…imagine all the people I’ll have to meet…” The words faded and his eyes squeezed closed for a moment. “All the places I’ll have to go, things I’ll have to say. How am I gonna do that?”
Looking down, I saw his fists were tighter now, his nails scratching. I took hold of his wrists, brought his hands between us. “It’ll be easy,” I said, cocking my head and smiling up at him. “Because I’ll be right by your side the whole way, giving your foot a little kick.”
He shook his head, frowned like he couldn’t believe it. “Promise,” he said, clutching my hands. “Promise you’ll do this with me. I’m worried I’m not cut out for all this, and I’ll fuck it all up on my own, I know it.”
“You’ll never be alone, Hugo.” It was a promise I’d never felt more confident making. “And you were born to do this. Just…sing. Play. Find yourself. Entertain people. I’ll help you with the rest.”
Just then, a crew member in a headset burst into the room and yelled, “Going live again in thirty for the results show! Get down to makeup!”
“You need to go,” I said with an encouraging smile.
Hugo nodded. “I love you, Heli. I promise to always love you.”
“Stop being soft. Go get ‘em, superstar.” And I love you, too.
Hugo
“Which way? I don’t know which way!” My heart was pounding. I’d started to sweat. The man I knew as Ezra had a hand on my lower back and was steering me towards a door marked Exit Only. “That’s the exit. It’s the wrong way!”
He wasn’t listening to me. No one ever listened to me.
“Hugo!”
“We love you, Hugo!”
“Hugo, look at me. Please look at me!”
What felt like a thousand voices screamed my name as I was ushered further into the car park beneath the hotel. They were all I could hear, so loud in my ears. My head hurt, felt like it could burst any second, got so bad I couldn’t even see, and then it just…stopped.