He nodded, spotting the surprise in her eyes. At one time, he would have felt shame at admitting he needed help. He didn’t have that left in him. Now all he had was a purpose to heal all his broken pieces. “I’m putting in the work and doing what I should have done seven years ago and dealing with the trauma.”
For a split second, the cold Clara he didn’t know at all vanished and the soft Clara he knew all too well appeared. “No one deserves to struggle. It’s good you’re looking after your mental health, Sullivan.”
He nodded and rose, shoving his hands in his pockets, staring down at her as the bright moon cast warm light over them. And with those sweet eyes on him, Sullivan was hit with something completely unexpected. He still loved her. Madly. Deeply. And, for him, it felt like no time had gone by at all when she looked at him like that. “One step at a time. Take this slow and get to know Mason. That’s the plan going forward.”
In an instant, the warmth was gone and a stranger was staring at him with distrusting eyes. “That’s the plan,” she agreed.
“All right,” he said, reaching back into his pocket to grab his wallet. “I’m staying in old Bart’s apartment for the month. Here’s my number.” He handed her a card. “You’ll be in touch?”
“I will.”
“Then, we’ll talk soon. Sleep tight.” He turned away and crossed over the gravel driveway to his rented truck, knowing full well his plan didn’t stop there. He mentally added one more task onto the list of what he needed to achieve before he left River Rock—earn Clara’s forgiveness.
6
The next morning, Clara peeked open an eye to find a bright, sunny day. She shifted onto her side in bed and stared out her bedroom window to the branches of the trees waving in the slight breeze. Last night filled her mind. Nothing was playing out like she’d intended. She had expected Sullivan to book it, not for him to own up to his past mistakes and try to better himself. A part of her heart finally healed at knowing why he left. In that same spot, there was sadness that Sullivan’s trauma had made him believe he was better off gone. Alongside that, was cold hard rage that Sullivan’s father had done this to him. That he’d taken a loving guy and destroyed him. That he stole away the Sullivan that Clara had blindly loved.
“Mama. Wake up.” A blur of navy-blue pajamas with astronauts on them rushed into her room.
Her mattress bounced as Mason jumped on her bed a second later. “Morning, honey,” she said, gathering him in her arms. He gave a boisterous laugh as she kissed his cheeks repeatedly. “Did you have good dreams?”
“No dreams.” He looked at her with those sweet eyes. “Do I have to go to school today?”
“Yup.” She gave him another big kiss while he wiggled out of her hold. “Go get dressed, and I’ll make you some pancakes.”
“Yum. Paaaaancakes.”
As fast as he’d come into her bedroom, he was gone, having no idea his life might change forever any day now. Be his shield. Nothing could hurt Mason, not if she simply held strong. And while Sullivan seemed to want to make amends and do the right thing, she didn’t know him anymore. One step at a time, she reminded herself. Determined to get her day started, she slid out of bed, aware of the slight headache that would most likely follow her for the rest of the day because of those shots.
While she got ready, tossing her hair up in a tight ponytail and dressing in jeans and a blouse, she tried to find all the hatred she’d had for Sullivan. But by the time she headed down the stairs, she realized that anger had vanished after their talk last night. He’d been honest and open, and now she had the answers she’d always needed. It felt like an apology even if the words were never said directly.
The moment she entered the bright, sunny kitchen, Amelia handed her a coffee mug full of piping-hot coffee made just how Clara liked it. “Tell me everything,” her sister stated. Amelia knew better than to ask Clara anything last night. She always needed time to gather her thoughts.
Clara chuckled then took a quick sip before setting it down to grab the frozen pancakes from the freezer as well as the sausages from the fridge. “We talked. That’s what happened.”
“Did it go okay?” Amelia asked, leaning forward, eyes bright with interest.
Only two years apart, Clara and Amelia were close. Maisie, being four years younger than Clara, had always been the baby sister, and only recently had their relationship blossomed into a friendship. Amelia was Clara’s best friend. Back in the day, Clara’s friends couldn’t relate to a young single mom. They were off, busy with their lives, partying wildly, making plans for the future, while Clara had been changing diapers. Amelia had been there through the good, the bad, and the ugly. “He gave me the answers I needed, and promised to only do what’s right for Mason. He said he’s here to heal from his past, not to stir up trouble. We’re going to take this day by day so he can get to know Mason before we make any big decisions.” When Amelia’s lips parted, Clara raised her hand. “Don’t ask more than that. I’m still processing it all, so don’t ask me how I feel about anything.”
Amelia blinked. Twice. “I don’t even know what to say.”
Clara lifted a finger. “Is this wise, for him to see Mason?” Another finger lifted. “He’s leaving in a month. What will happen after that?” She raised a third finger. “You two do have a lot of history together.” And a fourth finger went up. “I’m happy for you, but worried because of Mason and because Sullivan really hurt you before.”
“Yes,” Amelia said with a firm nod. “All of that.”
Clara understood her worry. Hell, she’d probably feel the same way in Amelia’s shoes. She stuck the pancakes in the toaster then wrapped Amelia in a tight hug. “Thank you for worrying, but I’m okay. I’m not the girl he left behind. My head is right on my shoulders. Mason’s well-being is all I’m thinking about right now.”
Amelia stepped out of the embrace. “I guess that makes sense.”
“Pancakes,” Mason yelled, running for the table.
And just like that, the conversation was over and Clara turned on mom-mode. She got Mason to school on time and grabbed some wood-fired bagels at the bakery for the week ahead on the way home. By the time she got back to the brewery, the parking lot had a couple of extra vehicles and one white van as well as Maisie’s car.
Clara parked in her usual spot near the house. She quickly took the bagels inside to the kitchen before heading to the barn. The moment she got close, she heard Sullivan’s smooth voice. Another few steps, and she realized why—a news crew was interviewing him.
Maisie stood a few feet away, so Clara hurried to her side. “What is this?” she asked when she reached Maisie.
Her younger sister smirked. “All Sullivan’s idea. He called Hayes late last night and asked if he could get a T-shirt and baseball hat with our logo on it. Then twenty minutes ago, Amelia called me and told me he’d shown up with reporters.”