Bryce’s face turns more serious. “Maybe,” he says. “What if two people are in love with each other, and neither knew about the other? What then?”
My breath catches in my throat, and I shove the thoughts away. He can’t be saying what I think he’s saying. He absolutely can’t. So I shove the thought away before it can take hold. “I don’t know,” I say. “Sounds like those two people were really missing out.”
“Yes, they were.”
After the graduation party, when I woke up feeling humiliated and embarrassed, I told myself that it was over. That I needed to get out of there before I ruined everything. That being in love with somebody who didn’t know wasn’t worth the pain.
So I shut those emotions down. But can I pretend that they ever really went away? Would I have been looking for him consciously and subconsciously for so long if I had been able to let go?
Do I still love Bryce?
I tell myself that I don’t. That all this is, is the remnants of young infatuation. That I’ll grow to love him the way he deserves. But the dropping of sensation of freefall in my stomach is telling me that I’m lying myself and that is absolutely terrifying. I can’t think about it, and I stop that thought in its tracks before I can give it a chance to take hold.
“So, will you go with me?”
The question brings me back, and it actually takes me a second to remember what he’s even talking about. The baby shower. Marcy. Right. “What if someone sees us together? If someone tells my parents…or my dad.”
“I’ve seen the guest list,” he says. “I’m pretty sure there’s no one on it that knows your family besides my immediate family.”
“The store…”
He cuts me off with a look. “Elle can handle it for a day. I’ve seen her work. She’s extremely capable, and I already know that you trust her. If you’re not ready to go, Katti, you can tell me. I won’t be offended.”
I hesitate. There’s a lot that makes me nervous about it, but I don’t want to say no to something just because of anxiety. That’s no way to live. “If you really think that she won’t mind, I would be happy to go with you.”
He grins down at me. “Perfect.” It’s not that I want to go to a baby shower. Marcy is a really wonderful person, but I don’t I have much of a friendship with her outside of Facebook, and the obligatory yearly ‘happy birthday!’ message. But taking a trip with Bryce and making this more real? That I can absolutely get behind.
“Do you have to go to work today?” I ask. “I don’t even really know what you do anymore, but you have to be in some kind of trouble just hanging out with me.”
He chuckles. “It’s fine. I own the company. I doubt anyone is going to object if I spend a couple of days away from the office.”
“You own the company?” I run my hands up and over his shoulders, arching into him and feeling his body respond to me. “Look at us, just a couple of business owners.”
“Two peas in a pod,” he murmurs, looking at me. That look is one that scares me with the depth of emotion. “I’m not in stocks anymore. After you moved away, I started a consulting firm. That’s why I moved away from Waterton. I don’t want to live in Boston—though from what I’ve seen your neighborhood is lovely—but I need to live closer to get to clients here. And thank fuck that I did. If I hadn’t, maybe I never would have been on that app in the first place, and maybe this never would’ve happened.”
I stretch, and he lets me up from underneath him. “I was going to ask you why you were on there.”
He shrugs. “Because I like smart women, and if I wasn’t going to be with you, then I at least wanted to meet someone that I could have a conversation with.”
“Until me,” I tease, “when your main interest was that I liked older men with accents.”
Bryce smiles smugly. “I’m human,” he says. “And that was too perfect to pass up. It seemed like it was tailor made for me. I guess it was, wasn’t it?”
“Mmmhmm.”
“What made you download the app?” he asks.
I dig in my dresser for a fresh pair of underwear and a bra. “Frustration. Because of you, actually.”
“This, I have to hear.”
Finishing putting on my bra, I cross my arms and turn to face him. “I had a dream about you—very rude and un-British of you by the way, just crashing someone’s dreams without permission—and it turned me on. I tried my usual trick, but it wasn’t working. I absolutely couldn’t get you out of my head, and I was a cranky mess all day because I couldn’t get off. I hate dating apps, but Elle recommended that one. The rest is history.”