“Can it wait? I’m hungry.” It’s almost my turn in line and my stomach rumbles. All I want is a salad and the cafeteria workers are almost out. If we go now, there’s no telling how long we’ll talk. They may be sold out by the time we get back, or worse, I might miss the whole lunch period.
“Asher already bought you lunch.”
I look over at my table again and notice that Liam is right. Asher has a coke and an untouched salad beside him. I smile and wonder how he knew, but I'm not surprised. Asher just knows things, like my favorite chips and Maggie's choice of ice cream. I turn my attention back to Liam and his hand on me. He's never been like this, physically possessive. I don't like it. “Fine, but let me go.”
Liam releases my arm and walks towards the cafeteria doors. I look over my shoulder again at Asher and our eyes lock. His face lights up when he sees me then falls upon noticing Liam. He must realize I'm not coming to the table. I don't think he likes it, but Liam won't leave me alone until we talk. I'd rather get this conversation over with now than have him crawl through my window tonight.
Liam pushes the door open but doesn’t hold it for me. Something I probably wouldn’t have noticed, until Asher. He turns on his heels once we're in the hallway and crosses his arms. “You’ve made your point. Are you done?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Asher,” he says, impatiently. “You officially win. I didn’t think it would bother me to see you with someone else, but it does. There. Are you happy?”
“Kind of." I smirk. I'm glad Liam is getting a taste of his own medicine. Watching him cuddle up with other girls in the hallway over the years has sucked and seeing him and Corah at the party was even worse. He deserves a little bit of suffering. "Hate to break it to you, Lee, but me being with Asher has nothing to do with you.”
“Of course it does!” He snorts. He's right, sort of, but I'm not ready to admit it. “Why else would you choose him?”
“What’s wrong with Asher?” I demand, crossing my arms. From what I've seen in the last few weeks, Liam and Asher aren't nearly as close as I thought they were. Now that football season is over and I sit at a different table, they aren't ever together.
“Everything, Lainey!” Liam shouts. He throws his hands in the air and storms down the hallway to the next set of lockers.
I follow him, needing to hear his explanation because I don't see it. Asher is kind and considerate. Now that he’s done being a jerk, he puts my feelings first and, even though we don’t talk much outside of school, he’s really good at communicating with me. Something Liam never wanted to in public unless I initiated the conversation.
“What does that even mean?”
“Asher is not a good guy. Have you seen where he lives?” Liam runs a hand through his hair, freshly cut, and lets the long strands fall back into place. He looks good, but not as good as Asher. “He is nothing but trash.”
I don't know what comes over me, but I shove Liam in the chest. He can't begin to relate to what Asher's life is like. Hell, I only got to see fifteen minutes of it, and what I witnessed blew my mind. “Asher is a good man, Liam.” I push him again and force him back a step. “People can't help the circumstances they are born into.” I shove him harder, growing more pissed off with each step we take. “You can’t imagine the shit he’s been through because you get to live the perfect life.” Shove. “You have two parents who love you.” Shove. “A best friend who deserves better.” Shove. “And opportunities you squandered by knocking up that bitch of yours.”
Liam backs into a locker. His eyes widen at the realization that I know his secret. The secret he should have told me because we were supposed to be best friends. I swear, the longer I look at him, the more infuriated I get.
“You can’t tell anyone about Corah, Lainey. Promise me.”
“You should know better,” I jeer.
“Ellie?” Asher queries. I look over my shoulder, and my stomach twists. From the outside looking in, it would seem that I’ve got Liam pinned up against the lockers. I look like I'm making a move on someone's baby daddy.
I take a step back from Liam, guilt that I’ve done something wrong twisting my insides. I open my mouth to defend myself but stop short when Asher holds his hand out to me. He pulls me close and wraps me in a protective hug. I fold into his arms and try not to notice the way he smells or how our bodies fit together. Asher
has shown me more affection in two weeks than Liam has in the last four years. I was naive to think Liam loved me.
Love doesn’t hide someone away in the shadows. It doesn’t make you question your every move, wondering if you’re going to piss the other person off. Most importantly, love doesn’t make you feel insecure.
I do not love Asher. I like him because he makes me happy. I don’t have to worry about what I say or wear around him. He’s proven that I can make a complete idiot of myself. I don’t have to worry about him leaving me for someone else, because he blatantly ignores other girls when I’m around, excluding Maggie. I like Asher because he makes me feel like I’m special.
Liam never did that. Even if nothing comes out of our fake romance, I’ve at least learned what a real relationship shouldn’t feel like.
“Are you good?” Asher asks me.
I look up into his eyes. That the turmoil I felt walking out of the cafeteria with Liam fades to dust when I'm in his arms. “Better now.”
“Good.” Asher dips his head and presses a kiss to my temple. His gaze follows movement behind us and I’m painfully aware Liam is still watching. Asher mustn’t care because a moment later, he’s looking at me again. “I bought lunch. We’d better hurry if we want to eat before the bell rings.”
Asher works every Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday evening, and all day Sunday, which doesn’t leave much time to hang out after school. We get out of class at two-fifteen and he has to be at the diner by three for the start of his shift until eleven. All of which was fine, until the nagging need to see him crept in. I don’t know what it is, but the more time I spend with him, the more it seems like it’s never enough.
Asher meets me at my car every morning. Walks me to as many classes as he can. Sits with Maggie, Russell, and me at lunch. Hangs out with me after school on his days off while I do my homework. Takes me to the beach on Saturday mornings. Watches movies at my house on Friday nights.
I should be happy.