But tonight, I’ve got barely two drinks in me, I’m fully focused—and I’m having the time of my life.
Is this what living it up really means?
And if it is, then what the hell am I doing with my riotous house parties? Numbing all of the pain? Giving everyone else a night to remember because I can’t find that kind of happiness for myself?
I leave the three of them on the dance floor and hit up the bar. When the bartender comes by, he’s already got the whole wrong idea of what my night has been like. “Dude, that guy you came in with, you gotta lock it down,” he tells me. “There are too many hot shits here tonight, and if you leave him alone too long, you’re gonna lose him. Why aren’t you doing your usual thing?”
I swear, he still thinks I’m that overly horny new guy in the gayborhood who bunny-rabbits his way from one guy to the next every weekend. “I’m not trying to ‘lock it down’ with him,” I tell him. “He’s my buddy from college.”
“You went to college??” The bartender laughs at that—too hard, I might add—then pours me a quick shot. “On the house. Liquid courage. You’re way too sober, my friend. Lock it down.”
“He’s straight,” I point out after I take the shot. “Thanks for this, by the way. We’re only here because his sister is getting married and has a hundred gay friends, apparently, so this is her happy place. I think he’s having a miserable time.”
“I read people for a living. And that guy?” He shakes his head. “He is not having a miserable time. He’s horny, frustrated, and wants you.”
I roll my eyes and laugh it off. “Sorry, but you don’t know what you’re talking about. I appreciate you trying to feed my unhealthy fantasies, but—”
“Feed them yourself. He’s heading this way.”
“What?” I spin around.
Skylar hops onto the barstool next to mine.
I blink, staring at him. “Skylar! Dude, did you just ditch your sister on the dance floor?”
The bartender, after giving us both a look—and failing to hide his superior smirk—slinks away to help someone else, leaving us to ourselves.
“More like they ditched me,” retorts Sky with a chuckle. “Lena is having so much fun. Too much.”
I smile, studying his eyes. “Are you alright, my man? You’ve been kinda … off … ever since we left the other side of town. Like you’ve got something on your mind.”
“No, no, I’m good.” He gives a glance over his shoulder, as if to check on his sister. Of course, we can’t see anything but gyrating bodies and flashing lights from here. “I haven’t seen Lena this happy in a long time. Especially after the stressful past few weeks we’ve had, putting this wedding together so last minute. I’m glad to see her having a great time with her best friend. Maria is Emilio’s sister, by the way,” he quickly adds. “Yeah, she’s marrying her best friend’s brother. She’s about to turn her best friend into her sister-in-law. I told her it was a bad idea, but …” He laughs. “Sisters never take their brothers’ advice. Be glad you don’t have siblings.”
He remembered. “I always wanted a brother.”
“I know. You basically turned me into one.”
I laugh at that. “Did I?”
Skylar looks me in the eyes. Quite suddenly, he turns serious. “I want to make something clear, and I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, or to get that way you get when I try to tell you something. I’ve got to say this, and it’s important.”
I feel my stomach wring itself dry.
Even the butterflies all take a perch somewhere as they wait with bated breath for whatever it is Skylar has to say.
He leans toward me and puts a hand on my arm. Every single cell in my body feels that hand. My eyes are locked on his. “Brett …”
“Yeah?”
“I …” He closes his eyes, gives himself half a second, then opens them. “I want you to know that nothing has to change between us.”
I’m still staring into his eyes. I feel like there’s more, and yet … “Yes?”
“I know it’s been years since we last hung out, and even though we’ve only just reconnected, there is clearly a very …” He chuckles awkwardly. “… a very strong connection between us, like we picked up right where we left off, as best buddies.”
“It feels like that for me, too,” I quickly put in.
“So all I’m saying is that being attracted to men doesn’t change anything between us. I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future, or where our lives are going to take us, but … I definitely know that you make me feel like a more complete person, Brett. I want you in my life.”
“I want you, too,” I tell him.