If I was a groomsman cat right now, my ears would’ve just folded back in frustration.
When the ladies take a trip to the restroom, I turn to Skylar. “I wanted to take them out for a fun night and spend some time with you. I didn’t think it’d be a totally lame bore fest for them.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, buddy.” Skylar throws an arm around my back and pulls me to his side. “They’re having a great time, trust me.”
Being this close to Skylar, I can see a thousand shades of crystalline brown in his eyes, infinite and full of life. His lips are perfectly pouty and inviting. I can’t even count how many nights we went out drinking back in the day, and how many times we would end up in this exact configuration: his arm around my back, hugging me to his side, and those inviting lips of his right in front of my eyes.
It’s like a dare he keeps giving me.
A dare I can’t possibly oblige.
“I guess I should cancel our tickets to the garter belt museum,” I say, borrowing his sister’s joke. Or was it her Maid of Honor’s? “They were pretty damned expensive.”
Skylar chuckles at that. “Good idea.”
“What should we do, then?” I ask.
Skylar shrugs. “I guess my sis is more … loud. She likes clubs and crazy bars and … well, I guess some other things are her scene, too, but—”
“What other things?” I ask. “Please. Tell me. I gotta save this night somehow.”
An uncomfortable look crosses Skylar’s face. “Well, she … she has a bunch of …” He finally lets it out. “Gay friends. She had tons of gay friends at college. She’s … really into the gay scene.”
I stare at him. Am I being baited to come out, or is he serious?
Skylar laughs it off suddenly and turns our half-hug into a firm pat on my back. “But it’s okay, bro. I’m not asking you to take us to a gay bar or something like that. I’m just telling you what kind of scene she’s used to.”
Is this my chance?
Is this when I finally let out my secret?
Just then, Lena and Maria return to the table. “Okay, okay,” Lena says at once, coming right up to me. “I’m sorry, I really don’t mean to be critical, I know you’re trying really hard, showing us all of these places, but … I can’t drink another sip of this.”
While staring at Skylar, the corner of my lips curls upward. Yes, this is my chance, and I’m taking it. “You won’t have to,” I tell her with a self-important puffing up of my chest, “since it just so happens, I know exactly where to take us next.”
“Please God no,” moans Maria to herself.
I face the ladies. “We’re heading to Mayville. Otherwise known as Gayville.”
Lena’s eyebrows pull together in a mixture of confusion and surprise.
“You heard me right,” I go on. “I’m gonna take you to the best damned drag bar in town … and we won’t let the night end until we’re super drunk on our asses, covered in other peoples’ glitter, or dressed in feather boas. How’s that sound?”
Lena and Maria look at each other, stunned.
Skylar comes up to me. “Dude, you don’t have to do this just for them,” he tells me quietly. “If you had other plans or whatever, I’m sure they’d—”
“Don’t be silly.” I put my arm around him and, just like he does to me, pull him up against my side. “I think it’s finally time for you to see my side of town.” I smirk at him. “Where I live.”
It takes him half a second before he connects the dots. “Your side of town …?”
“Wait a sec,” mutters Lena, staring at me. “Are you telling me … you bat for the boys?”
Despite the nervous (nearly cardiac-arrest level) thumping of my heart, I’m proud as I face the ladies and give them a firm nod. “You bet I do.”
Those words sounded confident in my head.
They come out more like a squeak toy.
It doesn’t seem to matter, because at once, Lena’s eyes go wide, stars of delight fill them, and she excitedly cries, “Take me there! I need to be with my gays! Oh my God, take me there now!”
With a stiffened-up Skylar still in my grasp, I give her a self-assured grin. “The bride’s wish is my command.”
7
Trade the smoggy, traffic-lined curbsides for a flashing, body-stuffed room.
Trade the streetlights for club lights and glitter.
Trade the noise of car horns for happy shouts of laughter and thumping dance music.
Trade the snobs of Uptown for drag queens.
Welcome to Dames & Dudes.
On the stage is a drag queen doing a lip sync show to a sea of cheerful men and women. There is a big dance floor where people are getting down, and a semicircular bar near the door, where Lena and Maria quickly rushed to fetch themselves some drinks before we all flooded the dance floor.