“It wasn’t planned, I know. But I wanted that child with you so damn bad.” Hammer confirmed Liam’s greatest fear. “Christ, I kept picturing a daughter as beautiful as her mother.”
Raine laughed through her tears, clinging to Macen’s shoulders. “And I’d hoped for a boy, just like his father.”
The earth’s axis shifted beneath Liam. She’d wanted Hammer’s baby. But she’d wanted him more? Raine’s sorrow, along with the heartfelt confessions she and Hammer shared, told Liam that she wasn’t at peace. But damn it, he wasn’t, either.
There was no sense in trying to convince himself that his world hadn’t just blown up in his face, that his dreams of sharing a life with this woman, just the two of them, lay dying around him. A vise gripped his heart. He couldn’t bloody breathe as he swallowed the urge to roar out that any life growing in Raine’s womb would be his—and his alone.
But instead of erupting with the injustice of it all, he had to put on an act worthy of a goddamn Oscar and watch sobs shake Raine. He had to see Macen cradle her as they shared grief. And he couldn’t say a damn thing or he’d risk destroying her.
As they clung to one another, Liam felt fucking invisible. And that broke his heart more than anything.
He reached beneath Raine, lifting her gently so he could move back and stand apart.
She whirled on the table, bracing herself on the padded surface, and turned devastated eyes to him. “Don’t. Please… This is the biggest reason I never wanted to talk about how late my period was or whether I was pregnant. No matter what I said, someone would be hurt. You’ve done so much for me, sacrificed your feelings so I could break through my barriers. Whatever you believe, I do love you. And I knew the minute I opened my mouth, I could do more damage to you than we might ever recover from.”
“No, it’s fine. I’m just giving you some room, is all.” He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it, hoping she wouldn’t notice his shaking fingers. He couldn’t even look at Hammer. “Of course you were disappointed. Why wouldn’t you be? I know you want children someday.”
“But, I—”
“You don’t have to explain.” Liam forced himself to keep his voice even and calm. “Hammer is going to carry you to bed, love. Rest up for a bit. It’s been a big morning, and you were so brave. I’m proud of you, Raine.”
How bittersweet was it that she’d finally given him exactly the answer he’d sought two long weeks ago. And just as she’d feared, it had annihilated him.
“Stay with me,” she begged.
“I’ll be here. Go on with Hammer. He needs time with you. I think you need it, too. If you’re up for it, we’ll take a walk outside after lunch, maybe throw a snowball or two. But for now, get some rest. You’ve earned it.”
Raine gave him a sad, watery nod, then turned back to Hammer. The other man scooped her up in his arms and waited while Liam opened the door to the playroom. He followed them to her bedroom. Inside, Liam inched back the covers and watched in helpless fury as Hammer lay beside her and drew her into his arms again.
Liam bent to kiss her before leaving, but her tears and Hammer’s tender endearments began again. This time they were too much for his crumbling composure. Silently, he retreated and went in search of solitude to ease his torment.
As the day wore on, Liam fought the acid brewing in his gut. With a controlled smile firmly in place, he’d managed to scrape through lunch. Even Raine and Hammer had been subdued, so sitting back and letting Beck and Seth try to lighten the mood had been easy. Hammer hadn’t fucked Raine, so he could be grateful for that one small mercy. If Macen had, Liam would have heard it as he paced in his room next to hers.
After lunch, he’d survived the hike with Hammer and Raine in the newly fallen snow, giving them stilted smiles and monosyllables. Liam had hoped breathing in the frosty air would cool his simmering anger or that taking in winter’s beauty might ice his pain. But Hammer’s presence only added fuel to the slow burn inside him. He’d held her hand, knowing that his “pal” held the other. It added some nasty kindling to his blaze.
Dinner had been a complete misery. Raine looked positively stunning in something tiny, white, and lacy. Liam hadn’t chosen it, so he could only presume Hammer had. Of course, he’d absolutely loved being cut off at the balls about Raine’s attire. He snorted. Macen hadn’t noticed his mood or cared. To Raine’s credit, she’d sat in his lap through part of the meal and tried to soothe him with kisses. He’d accepted her affection, taking her sweet mouth time and again, and trying to smother his ire.