I feel a presence behind me as I bow my head. I know immediately that Dan hasn’t left the room. He always does this. He waits for Rachel to leave, and then a new kind of torture begins. He bends down to sweep my hair over my shoulder. There’s coal dust in my hair now.
“Poor, pretty thing,” he whispers. I shudder as his fingers touch my neck, and not in a good way. Every time he touches me, I feel disgust filling my entire body, but there’s not much I can do. Even if I cried for help, who would come to help me? I don’t have a single friend in this place. I don’t even have any allies.
“You need to go, Dan. I have work to do, thanks to Rachel.” I sniff, trying to stand so I can get my cleaning tools. But Dan isn’t deterred. He grabs me by the waist and turns me to face him. I stand as still as I can, trying not to tremble as his face comes closer to mine. I know he’s going to try and kiss me, like he always does. But there’s no chance I’m having my very first kiss ruined by this monster.
I’m saving it for someone special.
“I could make the whole Rachel issue go away,” he whispers, his breath hot on my neck. I feel sick and close my eyes, forcing myself to endure the moment. “I could get her to back off...if you’d just stop being so frigid and admit you want me.”
“Leave me alone, Dan,” I whimper. I wish I could do more to get rid of him. I wish I could push him or kick him where it hurts, but I know he’d only find some way to make my life even more hellish. Maybe he’d even start forcing himself on me for real.
“Still not ready to admit it?” he murmurs. Then he tsks. “Alright. I guess I’ll give you a while longer to think about what you want, but Rachel isn’t going to play nice much longer. You’d better prepare for her to unleash hell on you, babe.”
I wince at that word. I’m not his babe. I’m no one’s babe. I might seem weak in the face of the two house bullies, but I’m playing smart here. Because even though this house is hell on earth, it keeps me close to the man I’ve spent the last five months pining over.
As Dan leaves the room, I close my eyes and go to the one place in the recesses of my mind where I feel safe.
In my fantasies.
A place where I’m not working as a cleaner anymore. Instead, I’m the woman of this incredible house. I’m Mr. Harris, Leo’s, companion, his partner in every sense, his love. We spend our days working hard together, and our night making loud, passionate love, keeping all my tormentors awake all night long. I smile to myself. It’s a ridiculous fantasy, really. I know it’ll never happen. But thinking about it sometimes allows me to escape reality for a while, and that’s all I need.
When I open my eyes again, I sigh at the mess that Rachel has made. I should learn not to talk back to her. Maybe she wouldn’t treat me so badly if I’d just lay down and take her abuse. But the thought makes me feel sick. I guess until my knight in shining armor comes for me, I’ll just have to fend for myself.
Except I can’t help thinking that I already know who my knight is. It’s him. Mr. Harris. I barely get to see him, but I can never get him off my mind. His handsome face haunts my thoughts, his strong jawline, his stubbled chin, his dark, intense eyes. He’s the very definition of tall, dark and handsome. And the thing is, he’s more than capable of saving me. He just hasn’t heard me crying out for help.
But Dan is right. Rachel isn’t ever going to let up. She’s trying to make me leave here forever so that she can have her shot with Mr. Harris. And the thing is, I know I should go. I should leave this awful place behind and go out into the world to follow my other dreams. I could find a way to fund my painting and try to make a living that way. I know my art is good enough to make me a career.
But every time I try to leave, I find that I just can’t. I’ve gone as far as to pack my suitcase, making it to the front door in the middle of the night, but something stops me from crossing the line. And I know that it’s all about him. Mr. Harris. The man who will never want me the way I want him. And yet, I think about the time he smiled at me and hope ignites within me. I still think I have a chance, or I would’ve left a long time ago.