CHAPTER FIVE
‘WELL,’ announced Vi robustly, ‘to my mind it’s just the thing to get little Joey used to you.’
Her eyes went approvingly to Xander. Clare, at the furthest end possible of the sofa, stared aghast at Vi.
‘You can’t mean that!’
How could Vi be taking Xander’s part? How could she even be civil to him? She was being even more than civil—she was treating him with approbation. She’d all but forced Clare to take Joey out to the park with Xander today, when he’d turned up just after lunchtime on the first day of the weekend. Clare had walked in stony silence, pushing the buggy, while Xander focussed all his attention on Joey. It had been excruciating.
His arrival back at Vi’s house after four days had sent her hopes plummeting. She’d been hoping against hope that he’d gone abroad, summoned by all his complex international business dealings. Yet even the few days’ intermission had allowed her, she knew, to mitigate the demolishing shock that had possessed her. She’d had time to accept that the nightmare was real, that Xander Anaketos had found out about Joey—and that he wanted to be a part of Joey’s life.
And Joey, it seemed, twisting the knife in her breast, was of the same opinion. His childish conversation had returned to the subject of his father time and again over the last few days, and even though Clare had done her best to change the subject, Vi, of all people, had been matter-of-fact in answering.
‘He’ll come when he can, lamb. Dads have to work, remember? So he’s very busy.’
But not busy enough. Clare had heard his monster of a car arrive as Joey was finishing his lunch, and her heart had sunk to her shoes. Now it had congealed into cold ice. Was he insane, thinking she and Joey would go on holiday with him? Yet here was Vi, thinking it was a perfectly unexceptional thing to suggest.
‘Yes,’ Vi retorted. ‘A holiday together would be just the thing. It’s a very good idea.’
‘I don’t want to!’ Clare exclaimed vehemently.
Vi gave her a level look. ‘Joey’s got a right to his father, love,’ she said calmly. Her gaze went to Xander again. He gave her a slight nod of acknowledgement.
Clare was staring at Vi as if she were a traitor.
‘He can come and visit here!’ she countered.
‘Well, he will, love. And he is already, and that’s all very well. But Joey needs to spend more time than just an outing to the park or some playtime indoors. A holiday would be just the thing, like I say.’
‘I couldn’t possibly leave you, Vi. How would you manage?’ Clare said desperately.
‘That has been taken care of,’ Xander interjected. ‘Mrs Porter has been good enough to accept a minute token of my appreciation for her contribution to the care of my son over these last years. While Joey is on holiday she will be too.’
‘That’s right,’ said Vi. ‘Though I don’t need thanking—Clare and Joey are family to me. But I’ll be very glad to see Devon again.’
Clare felt another punch of betrayal go through her. ‘We were going to go there all together! In the summer—’
‘Well, Clare, love, a caravan always was going to be a bit tricky for me, wasn’t it? And this hotel I’m going to is specially adapted for old people, and it’s right on the sea front. It couldn’t be better. And this time of year the town won’t be too crowded either—nor the weather too hot for me.’
‘So, do you have any more objections?’
Clare’s eyes snapped to those of the figure at the other end of the sofa. Somewhere deep inside, on a different plane of existence from the one her mind was occupying, something detonated. Xander was not wearing a business suit today. He wore the kind of casual wear that looked relaxed but was, she could tell at a glance, extremely expensive. His dark blue sweater was cashmere, his loafers hand-made, his petrol-blue trousers bespoke tailored.
But it wasn’t his clothes that had caused the detonation.
It was the body beneath…
The body she had once known with such sensual intimacy that if she even began to remember it would crucify her…
I don’t need this.
Wasn’t it hideous enough having to watch Xander with Joey—and, worse, Joey responding with increasing confidence and pleasure to all the attention from him? Wasn’t that enough torment for her?
Why did her own self have to betray her as well?
There was only one cruel comfort, if such a thing were possible in this nightmare that had engulfed her since she had come face to face with Xander Anaketos again. Only one.
That, whatever her treacherous memory might be trying to conjure back, it was finding no answering echo within him.
From him came only grim hostility and condemnation.
Be grateful for it, she thought. Be grateful he treats you like a block of wood!
And she must do likewise. It was the only way she would be able to cope.
But how could she possibly survive a holiday in his company? She couldn’t. It was impossible.
‘Well?’ Xander’s prompt came again. ‘Do you think Joey would not enjoy the seaside?’
She would not, would not be steamrollered like this.
‘He can enjoy it here, in this country. Taking him to the Caribbean is just ridiculous.’
‘It’s at its best at this time of year,’ said Xander. ‘And though the flight is long, one of the advantages of a private plane is that we can not only fly whenever we want, but there will be ample room for Joey to move about freely and be entertained. Surely you remember,’ he said, and his eyes levelled at her, ‘how easy travel is when you can do it in comfort?’
She pulled her eyes away. Oh, God, she remembered only too well. Remembered how Xander had taken advantage of the sleeping accommodation on his private long-haul jet.
Not that that they had slept much…
‘Joey will have a lovely time,’ Vi said, speaking decisively. ‘And that’s what’s important. Isn’t it, Clare, love?’
She looked speakingly across at her, and all Clare could do was feel totally, absolutely betrayed.
Xander got to his feet. ‘My PA will be in touch on Monday, and will make all the arrangements necessary—including whatever is needed to expedite Joey’s passport.’ He glanced at his watch.
The gesture was not lost on Clare. It was Saturday—Xander Anaketos would not be spending the evening alone. What was his current mistress like—blonde, brunette, redhead? Petite, voluptuous, tall? She let the litany run like a river of pain through her head. The one who had replaced her four years ago had been her opposite—a fiery, tempestuous Latino beauty, with a taste for flamboyant, revealing clothes. She’d seen a picture of them together in a gossip magazine at the antenatal clinic. Clearly Xander had got bored with the cool, classic type that she had exemplified, had wanted something more exciting…
She tore her mind away. Xander Anaketos’s sexual tastes, both past and present, were of no concern to her.
They never would be again.
The river of pain in her head intensified.
CHAPTER SIX
‘SEA!’ yelled Joey, beside himself with excitement. ‘There, there!’
He pointed through the car window to where a bay of dazzling azure blue had just become visible, fringed with vivid emerald-green, all drenched in the hot glare of the Caribbean sun. They had landed at the small, deserted airport of this tiny Caribbean jewel half an hour ago, and were heading to the coast in a chauffeur-driven car.
Contrary to Clare’s apprehensions about the long flight, Joey had revelled in every moment, fascinated with the swivelling leather seats, the seat belts, the huge TV screen, the onboard bathroom, the portholes, the cockpit, the galley, and every other aspect of the private jet that had winged them across the Atlantic. To Clare’s astonishment Xander had spent the time exclusively devoting himself to keeping Joey entertained, whether by playing childish computer games with him or doing colouring and jigsaws. It was very different from her memories of travelling with Xander as his mistress. He had either spent flights working at his laptop and his papers—or sweeping her back to the sleeping accommodation for some undivided personal attention.
Now he was giving her his undivided personal inattention. He was turned away from her, chatting to Joey, pointing out the sights of the island’s landscapes.
‘See those big trees, and all the round fruits dangling off them like they’re on bits of string? Those are mangoes—you’ll like mangoes. We’ll have some for breakfast. They’re very juicy and sweet. And those trees there are banana trees. Do you know something funny about bananas?’
Joey shook his head, eyes wide.
‘They grow upside down. I’ll show you when we’re at the villa.’
Clare was staring bleakly out of her window. She’d been twice to the Caribbean with Xander. Not, thank God, to this island, but even without direct memories just being in the Caribbean was painful. Most of the time she’d been with Xander had been spent travelling with him. He had constantly been doing business. Only occasionally had he pulled the plug on his business affairs and actually had a holiday. Their two visits to the Caribbean had been such. They’d stayed at the kind of five-star boutique hideaway hotel that was written about in the Sunday newspapers with breathless awe at what money could buy, surrounded by exclusively rich and beautiful people—the men rich, the women beautiful.