Okay, I’d definitely need to steer clear of him. Big guys and I just didn’t mix. The gay ones only saw me as an easy lay and the straight ones figured why not kill two birds with one stone and beat the shit out of the fag who also looked like a freak. And the not-so-straight ones–they were the worst because they had a tendency to think that the makeup and nail polish I liked to wear meant that there was something besides a dick behind my zipper or that fucking a “girly” guy made them less of a homo.
I resisted the urge to turn the car around and get us out of there. I’d envisioned a quick, harmless encounter with Nolan. I hadn’t been expecting He-Man to be at the party. I shifted my gaze from the brick wall to Nolan and the man leaning heavily against him. He looked like a slightly smaller version of He-Man.
Though small wasn’t the right word.
He looked like He-Man who hadn’t discovered the joy of steroids yet.
God, either way, I was getting my ass kicked.
But I didn’t have a choice. The guilt was already crushing me–not only would my mother have been horrified by what I’d done, but how was I supposed to look Newt in the eye and tell him to always do the right thing when I couldn’t live by that motto myself?
I forced myself to open the door. My jacket was sitting on the front passenger seat, but I didn’t bother grabbing it because I wasn’t planning on being here long enough to warrant it. Of course, I’d forgotten we were in the land that the sun could no longer reach.
“Shit, it’s cold,” I muttered as the icy air blasted my skin. I tucked my hands up under my armpits and then forced a smile to my mouth. But when not one of the three men uttered even a single word of welcome, I let the smile drop off. Holy hell, did they already know who I was? Maybe Nolan’s mom had told them I was coming?
No, it was something else.
Whatever was happening, whatever tension was rife in the air, it wasn’t about me. I’d clearly interrupted something. I automatically looked to Mr. Brick Wall and saw him staring at me like I’d just stepped out of an alien spaceship.
Judgmental asshole. I wanted to tell him to get his ass out of Bumfuck, Minnesota sometime and see that the world was full of freaks who were even more out there than me. I was about to tell him as much when a flash of white caught my eye.
I know, right? White in the land of snow? But this white had four legs and scary-looking eyes that latched onto mine as it came around my car.
“Holy fuck, is that a wolf?” I asked as the animal approached me. I wasn’t particularly scared because I doubted the men would allow a dangerous animal to be roaming loose.
“Can I see?” Newt called as he opened the back door.
Damn, for a four-year-old, he had excellent hearing. Of course, that only applied when he wanted to hear something. When he didn’t, well…
“Hey, no, stay in the car,” I said to him. “It’s too cold out here for you.”
“No, it’s not,” Newt responded. The rusty door squeaked as Newt tried to push it all the way open, so I quickly grabbed and held it so it wouldn’t inadvertently swing back on him. I watched as the wolf approached my brother. Newt didn’t have a lot of fear when it came to trying new things, so I wasn’t particularly worried about him being afraid of the large animal, but I kept an eye on the pair just the same.
“What’s his name?” Newt asked.
“Loki,” Nolan answered. “What’s your name?”
Before I could say Newt’s fake name as a reminder for him not to use his real one, he announced, “Newton.”
Every time we moved to a new place, I tried to explain to Newt that he needed to remember to use the fake name I’d made up for him, but he always forgot. I knew it was a lot to ask a four-year-old, but it wasn’t like Newton was a forgettable name. And Newt and I really needed to be forgettable.
“Can we help you?” Nolan asked after watching Loki and Newt make friends. My brother began tossing snow up into the air for Loki to catch. I was glad I’d had him leave his parka and rain boots on after leaving the Grainger house.
“Um, you’re Nolan Grainger,” I said, more to buy time than anything else. I couldn’t help but glance at the brick wall again just to make sure he wasn’t within reaching distance. Not that I could actually get away from any of them if they chose to try and grab me. Even if Newt had stayed in the car, I still wouldn’t have had a chance of escaping the two bigger men. The one next to Nolan had a bandage on his throat, but I doubted it would slow him down if he wanted to detain me. But Brick Wall was my immediate concern, even though he was the farthest one from me.