Nolan still seemed hesitant to touch the animal, so I grabbed his hand and forced it down to Loki’s paw. Nolan stiffened, but then he was returning the doggy handshake. He smiled when Loki licked his hand.
“He’s beautiful,” Nolan murmured. “You rescued him?” he asked when he turned back to me. My eyes fell to the bags beneath his eyes, and I wondered how long he’d been having trouble sleeping. I didn’t remember seeing the smudges a week ago when he’d dropped the baby raccoon off.
I nodded again and put my hands close together, leaving about a foot between them.
“When he was a puppy?” Nolan asked as his eyes fell to my hands. When I nodded he said, “What happened to him?” And right after that he seemed to realize his mistake because he dropped his eyes and said, “Sorry.”
It would have been better if I’d just ignored the question and sent him on his way, but something had me leaning down and motioning to Loki with a small jerk of my fingers. The animal instantly got up and came to me. He sat down and snuck a lick along my cheek. I took his right paw in my hand and gently pinched my fingers around it. My hand looked like a large claw surrounding the paw.
“He hurt his paw?” Nolan asked. I nodded and again showed him the claw around the animal’s foot. “In a trap?” I gave Nolan the okay sign with my fingers and then motioned him down so he could see better. I spread Loki’s paw wide so Nolan could see for himself that two toes were missing. A frown twisted his features as we both straightened, and I used two fingers to mimic a walking motion and then shook my head.
Nolan nodded in understanding. “He was hurt and couldn’t walk.” To Loki he said, “Poor baby,” and then ran his fingers over the animal’s head. He smiled when Loki licked his wrist.
Nolan’s gaze returned to me and the smile fell from his pretty mouth as his eyes held mine. My body instantly responded. Nolan swallowed hard and then his tongue was coming out to wet his lips. I groaned and Nolan snapped his head up at the sound. I half expected him to accuse me of lying about not being able to talk or something, he was staring at me so hard.
“Sorry,” he said, quickly dropping his eyes. “Google said you can still make certain sounds because you’re forcing air out of your body but I…”
His voice dropped off suddenly as he realized what he’d said.
I, myself, was stunned.
He’d googled my condition?
Why?
“Shit, I mean…Oh God, I’m sorry, Dallas. I wasn’t trying to pry into your business but I was curious last night and…fuck.”
I smiled because there was just no getting over how cute he was when he got all flustered. His skin had flushed a pretty shade of pink and I was half-tempted to reach out and touch it just to see how warm it was.
Yeah, I really did need to get him out of here.
Since his eyes were downcast, I tapped his arm and then flashed him the okay sign. He nodded but didn’t say anything. I didn’t like how dejected he looked. But I ignored the compelling need to touch him again and went to the door to open it, hoping he’d get the message.
He did.
I followed him outside and watched as he headed toward his car. It wasn’t the same car he’d been driving the night before, so I could only assume that one was in the shop. I watched as Nolan searched his pocket for his keys. He cast me a glance and nodded his head briefly. “Thanks again for last night.” He didn’t wait for me to respond as he went around to the driver’s side of the car. His eyes were downcast as he reached for the door handle, but once he wrapped his fingers around it, he just hung there.
I waited for him to move or, at the very least, say something, but it was like he was locked in place. I was about to tap on the hood of his car to get his attention when I saw his shoulders start to shake. Despair tore through me as I realized what was happening.
And how wholly unequipped I was to handle it.
“Dallas?” Nolan whispered. He didn’t look up as he dashed at his eyes.
At the tears I knew were there, but that I couldn’t see because he refused to look up at me.
“Can I…can I see the baby raccoon?” Nolan asked, his voice barely there.
Something inside of me twisted painfully at the all-too-familiar scene of the Nolan Grainger who’d haunted my dreams in school.
And not in the good way.
As badly as I wanted to send him on his way, I couldn’t. It was like I was back in my Jeep watching Nolan wipe those fucking eggs off his body as he softly cried.