I turned and began walking again, hoping to lose myself so deep in the woods that even if I wanted to go home, I couldn't. But the brush moving behind me made it clear I still wasn't alone. I stopped and then got a sharp nudge between the shoulder blades. I stood there for a while, waiting for the horse to get tired and leave. But the animal stayed, and when I finally turned around, he pressed his big head against my chest.
I leaned against Grover for a while, then I walked around him and got on his back. I was tired and cold and everything hurt, so I held the reins loosely in my hand and gave Grover his head.
The horse eventually began walking when I didn’t give him a command, but I paid no attention to where he was taking me.
Because it just didn’t matter anymore.
Chapter 21
Brooks
It'd been a good five minutes and I still couldn't find him. It was turning out to be the longest five minutes of my life. Maybe if Uncle Curtis hadn't told me how quiet Xavier had seemed and that he’d appeared to think I'd left for good, I wouldn't be as panicked. But as soon as he'd said that, I'd been out the door and searching for Xavier.
I’d started with the foreman's house, expecting to find him working on the structure. But he wasn't there, and I hadn't been able to find him in the barn either. I'd tried dialing his cell phone repeatedly, but my relief had turned to dread when Sara had answered. She'd inadvertently kept her brother's phone when he'd dropped her off at her house after the fair. I'd managed to keep myself together as I'd told her I'd let him know she had it, but as soon as I'd hung up the phone, I'd felt like I was going to have a heart attack. The idea that all the texts I'd sent him telling him where I'd gone and that I'd be back had gone unread made me want to throw up all over again.
"Did you find him?" Jules asked when he met me in the driveway as I returned from the barn. My friend had insisted on returning to Eden with me, despite what he'd gone through. Uncle Curtis came out of the house at the same time and asked the same question.
"No," I practically yelled as my panic turned to flat-out terror. There were only so many places on the ranch that he could be. And if he wasn't in any of them, what did that mean? His truck was here, so he hadn’t driven anywhere.
"Grover," I blurted, and I quickly turned and ran back to the barn. Sure enough, the buckskin wasn't in his stall. He was one of the few horses that spent the nights in the barn. "Grover's gone," I said when Jules and Uncle Curtis came up behind me. I turned to Uncle Curtis and said, "Where would Xavier go?"
Uncle Curtis shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry, son, I don't know. But I'm sure he'll be back by morning."
I couldn't wait for morning. I wouldn't wait for morning. I didn't want to wait for even another second and have Xavier believe that I’d left him.
"I need to find him," I said. I hurried to Buttercup's stall and pulled the old mare out of it. She obliged me, but just barely. She clearly wasn't keen on being disturbed while half asleep. I petted her nose and said, "Please, Buttercup, I need your help." I knew I was probably imagining it, but it seemed like she nudged me just a little.
"What are you doing?" Jules said. "It’s almost midnight! You can't go out there!”
"That's exactly where I’m going," I snapped. I began heaving the heavy saddle onto Buttercup's back. I struggled with the girth and the many steps Xavier had shown me on how to tighten it. When I couldn't figure it out, I looked desperately at Uncle Curtis. I shook my head and said, "Don't try to stop me. I'll go on foot if I have to."
Uncle Curtis opened his mouth to say something, then snapped it shut and suddenly stepped forward. He began tightening the girth at the same time that he looked at Jules. "You, go to the bunkhouse and find the new guy. His name is Flynn. Tell him I sent you for him and bring him back here." Jules took off without hesitation. Uncle Curtis looked at me and said, "Flynn is good at tracking. It will help us find him."
With that, Uncle Curtis went to one of the stalls and led a dark horse out of it. He handed me the lead rope and said, "Get a bridle on this one, I'll go get the saddle."