I commanded my mind to release him, but a part of my brain hesitated and I knew why. Just as I began to reach my hand down to quickly check Ethan’s clothes for any hidden weapons, the overhead light came on.
“What are you doing?” Lucy shouted and then she was coming at me.
“Don’t fucking move!” I yelled at her because I was too close to the edge. If she put her hands on me, I wasn’t sure what would happen. Luckily, my tone registered with her and she stopped several feet short of us.
And I knew Ethan had finally seen what he likely couldn’t have in the dark. It was the same thing I knew he’d seen several days earlier when I’d been moving the blanket off his lap after he’d vomited on himself and he’d grabbed my wrist. “Do what he says, Lucy,” he managed to say between panicked breaths.
Lucy held back, the stark fear in her eyes clear as day. I ignored the guilt of knowing how badly I was scaring her and focused my attention on Ethan, though I kept Lucy in my periphery in case she tried anything.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” I said as calmly as I could, my eyes on Ethan’s. I needed him to calm down or I’d never be able to search him. And if I couldn’t search him, I couldn’t release him.
Ethan managed a nod, but I could tell he didn’t believe me.
“I just need to make sure you aren’t armed. I’ll let you go as soon as I’m done.”
“I’m not, I swear it.”
I didn’t bother telling him he could swear it until the cows came home. Instead, I held him there, my grip on his neck as loose as it could be while still keeping him under my control. I hated the sight of the dark bruises beneath my fingers, but I had no choice.
He’d started this by betraying me.
Several long seconds passed before Ethan finally seemed to realize I wasn’t letting him go, but that I also wasn’t restricting his airflow. His breathing evened out and his grip on my wrist relaxed, though he didn’t remove it.
“I’m going to search you now,” I warned him. Lucy hadn’t moved even an inch.
“Okay,” Ethan said, his voice sounding a little more even.
He was still wearing my sweats and T-shirt. I made quick work of skimming my hands down his sides. Luckily, I was still too on edge for my body to react in any kind of way as I ran my hand over his ass and along his legs and groin before reaching up beneath the shirt. When I was satisfied that he wasn’t armed, I released him and stepped back. Ethan immediately moved away from me and put himself between me and Lucy. He reached his hand behind him to grab Lucy’s, but when she made a move to hug him, I shook my head. “Don’t.”
Lucy froze and a muffled sob left her throat. As badly as I wanted her to find the comfort in his arms that she so clearly needed, I couldn’t risk it. It would be too easy for her to transfer a weapon to him.
I shifted my eyes back to Ethan and said, “Don’t force me to search her too.”
Ethan’s gaze widened. His previously swollen eye had returned to its normal size, so it was startling to see how sharp and bright his green eyes really were.
“Go back to bed, Lucy,” Ethan said softly.
“No,” the girl immediately said, but Ethan quickly turned to face her. Unlike the other times I’d heard him talk to her, he seemed clear-headed and firm as he repeated the order. His words weren’t harsh, but he clearly was letting her know there was no room for argument.
Lucy nodded, but didn’t move right away.
“I’ll come check on you in a few minutes,” he said softly.
Another nod and then she was moving. Once she was gone, Ethan warily returned his eyes to me. “I wasn’t looking for a weapon,” he said. “I was looking for my car keys.”
I didn’t believe him, of course, but I didn’t say that. The part about his keys might be true, but I had no doubt if he’d been able to find a knife, he would have used it to his advantage.
“And what were you planning to do with your keys?” I asked coldly.
He didn’t answer, not that I needed him to. It didn’t take a genius to figure out he’d been planning to take Lucy and try and make a run for it. The fact that the girl had been dressed in street clothes instead of the leggings and sweatshirt I’d seen her wearing the last few nights had been telling enough. And while Ethan was still wearing my clothes since I hadn’t returned his to him, he’d managed to put on his shoes which had been in his room.