He moaned low, a sound of surrender, then kissed me in earnest. And lord, the man could kiss. On a dock in full sunlight or in the world’s most uncomfortable chairs, he could kiss. He kissed like he ate—slow and deliberate, like he wanted to taste each individual ingredient and like I was the feast he’d been waiting months for. Or rather, he kissed the same way I made music, like nuance mattered and no amount of time was too much to invest if it meant getting it right.
More pressure. Less. Soft. Hard. Teasing. He’d try something, then me, then him again, as easy as if we’d negotiated turns weeks in advance. He tangled his hand in my hair, pulling me closer, and I braced a hand against the table to keep it from toppling, and still we kissed. Derrick tasted like beer, which I’d never liked, but on him, the malty flavor mellowed to something sweeter I couldn’t get enough of.
“Damn. I could do that all night.” Breathing hard, Derrick groaned against my lips.
“Let’s.” I didn’t even finish my laugh before he was on me again, another kiss, hungrier now, more insistent, his tongue delving deeply as his grip on my head tightened. “For real, though, how about moving to the bed before we either roast valuable parts or become one with these awful chairs?”
“The bed.” Derrick sounded stricken and he slumped back in his chair, releasing his hold on me and taking the moment with him. “We shouldn’t.”
“Why not?” I wasn’t giving up so easily. We’d been on the verge of something transcendent, and every neuron in my body still vibrated with awareness. “Everyone already thinks we’re doing it. Why not have sex for real?”
“Because it would complicate everything.” Derrick scrubbed at his short hair. “Make a messier ending.”
“We already have our breakup plan.” Leaning forward, I stopped short of touching him again, hand hovering then returning to my lap, my body as indecisive as Derrick’s brain. “This doesn’t have to change that. Whether we hook up or not, we’re still toast next week.”
“That’s just it. I like you too much as it is.” Derrick’s pained expression canceled out any bump to my ego. He might like me, but he wasn’t happy about it. “You’re too nice for a casual one-off.”
Too nice. Fuck my life. I’d heard that a time or twelve before. I flopped back in my chair, head hitting the high back. “So I’m too likable to fuck? Sabrina’s right. I’m gonna die a virgin.”
Derrick’s eyes went wide and his face faded to several shades paler. “You’re a virgin?”
Hell. Me and my big mouth. He couldn’t have sounded more horrified than the way his voice tilted up on the word virgin.
“Oops. Hadn’t meant to say that part aloud.”
“Well, you did. And now we absolutely can’t have sex.” Pushing up out of his chair, Derrick paced away from me. “You can’t wait until twenty-five then lose your virginity as part of a fake-boyfriend scheme. That’s just wrong. You wait that long and it should be...special.”
“First off, the twenty-five part was not intentional.” I held up a hand. My stomach churned, not liking how easily Derrick had ruled out sex. “Waiting just kind of happened. I have a tendency to get distracted and caught up in work. And as you’ve noted, I’m geeky even by music geek standards. It turns out that rambling about ancient instruments doesn’t count as foreplay to most dudes. And being the RA in charge of enforcing dorm rules didn’t do my social life any favors either.”
“You’re not that geeky.” Derrick offered a half smile that didn’t make me feel any better.
“High praise.”
“I mean, you’re hot. Very hot. And likable. You could pull on any hookup app, but you chose not to go that route. Wait for someone who counts. Please.”
Oh God. The only thing worse than Derrick’s weak-sauce argument that I was too nice was him being patronizing with the advice.
“You could count.” My voice was surly, but I was fast running out of fucks to give about my tone.
“I can’t—”
“I don’t mean romantically.” Neither of us wanted to go catching feelings, but I strongly believed we could screw around without forming a lifetime attachment. “I meant that I need practice before it’s the real deal. Because guys tend to react exactly like you did with pearl-clutching horror when they hear the word virgin.”
Derrick made a sour face but didn’t deny his reaction. “Looking to get it over with is a shitty reason to have sex.”
“That’s not what I’m saying. I didn’t go the anonymous route because I didn’t want my first time to suck. But we’ve got mad chemistry.” Surely he couldn’t deny that. The sizzle when our lips met was real. “And you’re nice. You’re not going to be a jerk about it. It’s not going to suck, at least not the bad kind. The other kind of suck—”