He’d only told a fraction of my actual sins against Stella. I was heartened that he didn’t know the rest.
“All that may be true. Even so, I will get through that door.” I’d never hit Teddy, and I didn’t want to start, but the roaring need inside me to be with Stella drowned everything else out.
Teddy huffed his breath out through his nose. “Are you going to hurt her?”
Not today. “No.”
“Are you going to apologize?”
I tasted the word, bitter and rotten. Still, if it would get me past Teddy without violence, I’d do it. “Yes.”
“For everything?” He leaned closer.
“Yes.”
“I have your word?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
“Then you can go in. Just know that if I hear from Stella that you even said something to upset her, I am going to do my best to kick your ass. I know I won’t win, but I will give it all I’ve got. Understand?”
How did this fucked up family ever turn out a beautiful soul like Teddy?
“I understand.”
“Good. Give her a minute to change clothes.” He shuffled away from the door and gave me one more pointed scowl before heading to our wing of the house.
I waited for a few moments, the anticipation pacing in my chest like a lion on a leash. The bed creaked, and then silence. I waited a while longer to be sure before wrapping my palm around the door handle.
I turned it and eased inside. She lay curled up in a ball, her back to me. Her soft breaths were deep and slow.
Her resting form was beyond tempting, and I’d thought of nothing except her for so long—either with longing or hatred—that all I could do was stare. She was all mine now. No one else’s prying eyes watched her. I grew hard in my pants, but chided myself for already treading too harshly on Teddy’s rules.
Quietly, I removed my shirt and pants. Sliding into her bed felt like coming home, and for the first time in months, the hellfire that leapt in my heart quieted to embers. I moved my arm under her head and pressed into her back. I wanted to groan from the feel of her. My skin was numb until it touched hers, and then it was alive with every sensation.
She mumbled something and snuggled back into me, her hair tickling my nose as I pulled her close. I didn’t care that she thought I was Teddy. All I wanted was her in my arms. Everything quieted inside me, the sections of my mind that were always calculating or planning finally clicking off.
Her breathing changed, and she stirred. “Teddy. You’re um, you’re sort of poking me.” Her voice was a scratchy whisper, and I wished all over again that I’d killed Dylan.
She turned to face me and shrank back with a gasp. “What are you doing here?” She pushed at my chest, but I trapped her in my arms. I was never letting her go again.
“Stop, please. You’ll only hurt yourself more.”
She didn’t stop, only struggled harder, like a wildcat in my arms.
I nuzzled into her hair. “Stella, please. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry?” She froze. “That doesn’t even begin…” She swallowed hard. “To cover what you’ve done.”
“I know. But I will make it up to you somehow. All of it.”
“You can’t make it up to me.” Her voice broke, the pain in her piercing me more deeply than I thought possible.
“I can.” I stroked her cheek. “I will. You’ll see.”
She pulled away from my touch. “By marrying Sophia?”
“I’ll never marry her.”
“But you’ve been with her this whole time.” Her eyes shimmered in the low light.
“I’ve never touched her. I swear. She’s with someone else. I’ve only been with her to please Cal. They think I’ll marry her, of course, after I become Sovereign. I won’t.” Spending time with Sophia had been my personal ninth level of hell. Vapid, selfish, and cruel—we were a perfect match. I already wanted her dead for harming Stella, and having to spend time with her only made me come up with various gruesome ways for her to meet her end.
“I didn’t sleep with Lucius.” She shook her head. “I mean, I slept with him, but we never—”
“I know.” I kissed her forehead. “I’m sorry.”
“I believe you.” She relaxed into my arms more, though she still held back. “So what will happen when you don’t marry Sophia?”
“I don’t care. Cal will try to retaliate. I’m not sure what he’ll do. It won’t be pretty. Nothing approaching all-out war between our families, but things will be strained.”
“He’s promised me to Dylan.”
I froze. “What?”
“Cal is going to give me to Dylan once the Acquisition is over.” She shuddered.
“You’re not his to give.” I clutched her tighter and wished, once again, that I’d killed Dylan downstairs.
“They’ve made some sort of deal. I don’t know the details.”