One
Bree
* * *
“Take care of our boy,” Smith says with a grin as he closes the door.
“Our boy,” I whisper as my heart pounds in my chest.
Smith makes it impossible to know what he’s thinking. One day he’ll be sweet with small innocent touches which make my skin burn. The next day he’ll all but ignore me. After months of being the nanny to his son, Carter, it gets confusing. I know my main priority is Carter, but I can’t help the fact that when I leave Smith is the one I’m thinking about.
“Bree, come look at my block building,” Carter yells, breaking my train of thought.
“Wow, that’s the best building I’ve ever seen,” I say.
I sit down to play with him, unfortunately my mind isn’t here. I’m thinking of last night. Smith once again worked late and I had fallen asleep on the couch. I heard him come in the front door, but I stayed where I was. There was a part of me that wanted to know what he’d do seeing me asleep on the couch. I may have even made sure the short sundress I had on rode up letting my panties show just a bit. He whispered my name and my heart picked up speed, but I didn’t move. I don’t know what he was thinking, but he sat down by my head and the only thing he said was fuck. I’m not sure if it was because I was asleep or because he’s having as hard a time as I am not ripping his clothes off. Either way, the only thing he did was cover me with a blanket and go to bed. I can’t read him and I’m not sure if that is my inexperience or just him.
My phone rings and I rub Carter’s little head while I stand to grab it.
“Hello?”
“Hey girl, what’s your plans tonight?” Julia, my best friend asks in a hyper voice.
I know what she wants.
And I know people my age should be out experiencing life.
I don’t answer right away, as I look around the penthouse. Apparently, a little too long for her.
“Bree, come on you need to stop playing mommy and come hang out with us,” she says.
“I’m not playing house, I’m doing my job.”
She sighs and I roll my eyes. “You know I wish I could believe that, I really do, Bree.”
“What’s up, Julia?” I ask, losing my patience.
“I was wondering if you wanted to act like the nineteen-year-old you are and do something fun tonight?”
“If Smith doesn’t need to work late, sure,” I say.
“Yeah whatever, give me a call.”
She doesn’t even wait for my reply and hangs up. I shake my head and put my phone down. She doesn’t understand. This is my job. I need to be here when Smith can’t be. She is right though, I have avoided hanging out, especially if it means I get to spend some time with Smith. Right or wrong, it’s how I feel.
I want to be here.
After making Carter his favorite dinner of chicken nuggets and french fries, I sit down to relax a minute while he eats. It’s been a long day and it’s far from over. Smith called and told me he needs to work late. It’s no surprise, it happens all the time. I spend more time here with Carter and sometimes Smith than I do with my own family. A smile pulls at my mouth when I think of it. It’s exactly where I want to be.
“All done,” Carter says, pushing the little bit of food left on his plate.
The night carries on with the routine of bath time, several stories, and snuggling on the couch until I put him to bed. I pick up my phone to text Smith. My texts are always about Carter, even though I want them to be about so much more. I don’t think I can stop this want, this need. It’s consuming me, in the best damn way.
His mesmerizing eyes. The way the corner of his mouth pulls up on one side when he watches me. It turns me on in the most primal way. In a way I’ve never felt before. It’s no big secret I have it bad for Smith, and I wonder if he somehow knows about it.
I think I keep the ogling to a minimum whenever he’s around. Mainly it’s mere misses. He’s here when I get here in the mornings, and he’s usually rushing off to work. And by the time he shows up at night, it’s always so late I leave so he can get some rest.
Most nights he looks like he’s been run through the wringer. And with his demanding job, I’m sure he has. Letting him know how I feel will never be an option. I need this job. I can’t afford to lose it because I have the hots for my boss.