“I don’t know how I feel about it yet. It was a big price to pay to be free.”
I looked into her eyes. This girl had been through hell and back. She was alone in this life. No parents. No other family.
“It cost me fans. It cost me friends.” Her lashes glistened with tears. “Did it cost me you?”
I swallowed hard. Fuck.
35
Alexa
“Luke, can you forgive me?” I looked at him desperately. “I’m sorry. So sorry I didn’t tell you. I should have been honest from the beginning. From the minute I told you about my family. That’s when I should have told you.”
His eyes were set in a hard line. I couldn’t read him. I didn’t know if he was still angry, hurt, or just done with me.
And I knew I had screwed up. But if there was one person in this world who could forgive me it was this man. The one who had held me. Who saw me beyond the lights and the smoke. I waited anxiously.
“This is the hardest fucking decision of my life.” His jaw clenched. “I want you. But you annihilated me. I’m not the kind of man who runs the same play twice just to get obliterated a second time.”
The tear slipped from my cheek. Could I blame him? Could I judge him for not wanting to get hurt again? The pain gripped and seized me. I had flown here to be heard. I told my story and now it was time to pack my sequin dress and start my life over in Tennessee. I didn’t know how I’d leave. How I’d say goodbye to him.
“I’ll go,” I volunteered. “There’s a noon flight I can make.”
I felt sick. If I started to cry now in front of him, I might not stop. I had to get to the guest room and clean up before the tears unleashed on both of us.
“Hold on. I didn’t give you my answer.” He brushed the hair from my shoulder. “I didn’t know how much you meant to me, until you were gone, Alexa. I sat here in this ranch trying everyway I knew how to get you out of my pores. And it didn’t work.”
“What?”
“You heard me.” His eyes landed on me.
“Is that a yes?” I was fighting the tears.
“I should have given you a chance to explain.” His thumb traced my cheek. “I was a dick about it.”
“It’s ok. It’s ok. It was terrible. And confusing. And I feel like my emotions have been all over the place lately.” The tears came anyway.
Luke leaned toward me, scooping me into his arms. It was the first time I’d felt like we were connected again. The heat of his body soothed me. We were going to be ok.
My tears dotted the sleeve of his T-shirt.
His eyes lit. “Emotional?” He tilted his head. “Do you think…?
I unwrapped myself from his arms and stood. “I brought it with me. It’s in the guestroom.”
I walked down the hall to the room I stayed in last night. I barely slept, worried that Luke would send me home. That he wouldn’t be able to forgive me.
I dug through the bottom of my bag and pulled out the cardboard box with the plus and minus sign on the picture.
“That’s it?” he asked.
I nodded. “Are you ready for this? You sure?”
He cupped my face. “Yes.”
“Ok. I’ll be right back.” I walked into the bathroom. I read the instructions five times. I wanted to get it right. I wanted to give Luke what he wanted.
I opened the door, leaving the stick on the counter.