“May I speak to you, Aphrodite?”
“Of course!”
Marietta doubted Max could hear them, but she still felt awkward expressing her most private thoughts in front of him. She opened the door and stepped outside into the gallery. With a puzzled smile, her mother followed.
“Do you remember when you came to Greentree Manor, and we were reunited?” Marietta began cautiously.
“Of course I remember! To be with my two youngest daughters again after so long…I will never forget.”
“And do you know what I thought when I saw you, Aphrodite?”
Aphrodite shook her head, clearly puzzled. “No, Marietta, what was it you thought?”
“You were so different, so exciting. Greentree Manor had not seen anything as exotic as you since a circus leopard escaped onto the moors and it took twenty men to recapture it.” Marietta took a breath, realizing she was becoming a l
ittle melodramatic and Aphrodite was hiding a smile. “I always intended to fall wildly in love, like Vivianna. I suppose that was why I was so foolish as to run away with Gerard Jones, despite all the good advice I had to the contrary. I was a silly little romantic, in love with the idea of love. I know better now. I know that my destiny lies in becoming a courtesan, like you, and I want you to help me attain my goal.”
Aphrodite’s smile faded and she went still, seeming to withdraw into herself. Marietta waited, not knowing what to expect, but hoping that her mother would understand what she was asking. That she might even be proud that one of her daughters wanted to follow in her silk-slippered footsteps.
But as impatient as she was, the waiting grew too much for her. “Aphrodite, what are you thinking?”
The courtesan fixed Marietta with her dark gaze. “I am thinking that this is nothing but another romantic dream, mon petit puce. The life of a courtesan is not romantic. To survive in her world, to thrive in her world, a courtesan needs to be practical and clever and cold-hearted, just as I was a moment ago, when I wondered whether the attack on poor Lord Roseby would be bad for business. There is nothing of romance in it, or if there is, then it is very fleeting and must be…suppressed. You see, Marietta, romance is love and a woman cannot be a courtesan and love only one man. Many prosperous careers have been destroyed through falling in love.”
Marietta could not help but ask, “Have you ever fallen in love with just one man, Aphrodite?”
Her mother smiled, and there was something about that smile that reminded Marietta of Vivianna when she looked at Oliver. “Ah yes, I have loved, and it was love that finally led me to end my career.”
Marietta wanted to ask more, but the need to discuss her own plans had greater urgency.
“How can I make you understand? I don’t care about love anymore. I have ruined myself for love, and I have had my fill of it. I do not mean ever to put myself into a man’s power again, or to place my trust in his keeping.”
“You want to remain in control of your own destiny,” Aphrodite said softly. “You want to protect your heart. I understand that.”
“Yes!” she answered with relief. “And if I did not take this path, then what else would I do, Aphrodite? Stay at home and dream of what might have been? Allow Uncle William to lecture me on my scandalous behavior? I cannot, I will not. I want to live my life as fully as I can.”
Aphrodite smiled. “Is there no other choice between these two extremes?”
“I cannot see it.”
The courtesan sighed. “Being my daughter has destroyed all your chances of happiness. I see it now, and it is all my fault.”
“No!”
“Oui, oui, it is. Because I was selfish and wanted children of my own. That is so, Marietta.”
“How can Gerard be your fault? I was young and silly, and I let myself be swept away by him. He was a clever cad, but if I had been wiser, more cautious, I would have seen through him. No, I ruined myself. It is my fault and mine alone, and I accept that, just as I accept that I will never allow myself to love and trust a man again. But I do not intend to let any of those things spoil my life. I want to live, Madame, surely there is nothing wrong with that?”
Aphrodite sighed. “Marietta, you cannot just wish for a thing and have it happen to you. A courtesan does more than smile and take a gentleman’s coat and hat. You know this.”
She stepped closer. “Of course I do. I know what men want, and I’m sure I have some aptitude—I am your daughter, after all. I do not pretend I am very experienced in these matters. But I think I can learn, I want to learn. That is why I have come to you.”
Aphrodite cast up her eyes, but she was smiling.
“Do you see now why I think I would make a very good courtesan, madame? I am not looking for romance, I am very practical, and my reputation is already in tatters.”
Now Aphrodite laughed aloud, but sobered as quickly. “You say these things, but you do not really know—”
“That is why I want you to teach me!”