“You didn’t seem to have a problem with his mouth when I walked in here earlier.”
My cheeks flame. “His eyes were closed.”
She snorts with humor. “Is he a good kisser?”
“The best. I mean, I don’t have experience, but he’s much better than Cory. When he kisses me, I feel—”
“Possessed, like the only woman that exists in the world?”
“Exactly.”
“Then I can let go of all the worry I was holding onto.”
“You were worried about me?”
I look at my sister, and her disbelief is written all over her face.
“Of course, I was worried. I didn’t want you to end up getting involved with someone you didn’t want to be around. I didn’t want you to feel like you were just replacing one unwanted relationship with another.”
“He’s nothing like Charles.”
“I know he’s not, but we both know you didn’t agree to marry him because you loved him.”
“I can see myself loving him.”
I’m halfway there already if I’m being honest, and that scares the daylights out of me.
“Terrifying, isn’t it?”
“The scariest thing in the world,” I whisper.
“Thrilling?”
“Beyond belief. He’s so kind to me, Cara. He’s taking things slow. We didn’t kiss for the first time until today.”
“Thumper said he was a good man, and I wanted to believe him, but we don’t trust very easily.”
“No we don’t. Can we talk about you?”
“What exactly?”
She seems a little hesitant to speak about herself.
“Are you ever going to tell me about El Salvador?”
She twists her fingers in her lap. “It was horrible.”
“Javier was your abductor.”
“He wasn’t the one who took me. He was the one who bought me.”
I know this much already, but I can’t wrap my head around them being together now.
“That sounds absolutely awful.”
“He protected me. The things I thought were true, weren’t.”
“You don’t have to justify anything to me. Just… are you happy?”
“More than I ever thought possible.”
I pat her hands, trying to still them. “Then that’s all that matters.”
“We can talk more about it, but it’s still very raw for me.”
“I understand. Rivet is kind of awesome.”
She laughs.
I noticed the only female Cerberus member earlier. She’s like a female commando, so strong and sure of herself. If there’s anyone here I want to be like, it’s her.
“She’s incredible and the best one to go to if you want to learn how to shoot a gun.”
“The women shoot guns here?”
There are so many laws against firearms in California, but that hasn’t stopped Charles from having an arsenal at the compound. Women, of course, weren’t allowed to get near them, something I never questioned.
“You’ll find that women have the same rights around here as the men. Granted, they’re a little overprotective all the time, but if you want to shoot a gun or learn how to physically defend yourself, they’re very willing to instruct you. Just fair warning, they don’t really like it when we leave alone.”
“So we have to be supervised?”
“I wouldn’t really call it that, and it’s not as suffocating as it sounds. They just want to make sure we’re safe.”
“You’re making Farmington sound like a dangerous place.”
“Any place is dangerous, April. I was walking down a well-lit street when I was plucked from the sidewalk in Seattle. They just don’t like to take chances with our safety. Honestly, I never really want to leave the clubhouse without Javier with me.”
“Okay,” I agree because I don’t have the urge to leave either. I realize the mistake I made Saturday night, and this helps to explain Nate’s reaction to me leaving in the middle of the night. “What does everyone do when they’re gone?”
I hope she gives me a list because I’m going to go stir crazy if I have to sit in the room alone. He said he could be gone for weeks, and I don’t know that I’ve had enough time to mentally prepare for that.
“I pick up more shifts at the animal salon. Ivy works. Emmalyn, Khloe, and Misty try out new recipes. I think Em is dabbling with quilting again. You could probably show her a few pointers.”
“Quilting or anything I did back at the compound makes me want to claw at my own skin.” Since Charles refused to let most of the women leave the compound, money was tight. Anyone old enough was required to make things to sell. Quilts went for top dollar on places like Etsy and eBay, so it was one of the things I mastered very early in life.
“That’s understandable, but just know she always gifts them, either to the women’s shelter in town or people around here.” She points to the pile of gifts I’ve been trying to ignore. “I wouldn’t be surprised if there was one of her creations over there.”
“She hasn’t had time to make any quilts since I arrived.”
Cara laughs. “She’s drowning in them. I find it funny every time I see Kincaid with a random thread stuck to his clothes.”