I straighten in the chair, looking directly at him.
“I’ve had sex three times, and I’ve never found it enjoyable.”
His laugh surprises me, but the tears I feel welling surprise me even more. I’m feeling very vulnerable, and he’s using it as an opportunity to make fun of me.
“April?”
I can’t look at him, and I dig my teeth into my lower lip to keep from sobbing.
“Please don’t cry.”
Then his arms are around me, his face buried in my hair.
“I wasn’t laughing at you. I was remembering what sex as a teenage boy was like. We’re all selfish at that point in our lives. We’re selfish and the woman’s pleasure rarely crosses our minds. It’s no wonder you didn’t enjoy yourself. But for the record,” he says, pulling back and tilting my chin up, “I know better now. I know a woman’s pleasure can only heighten mine. I know the value of pleasing—”
His eyes drop to my lips for a brief second before he pulls away.
“Sorry.” He clears his throat and clamps his neck again. “I wasn’t laughing at you, and I’m sorry for you know… looking at you like that. I wasn’t trying to convince you to do anything with me.”
My cheeks are on fire, the sight of the bulge in his slacks brief before he turns away from me again.
“I… umm.”
“I just want the record to reflect that I’m an incredible lover. I mean I’m generous and—” He swallows, another little chuckle leaving his mouth. “And if we get to that point, I don’t want you to be afraid.”
He heaves out a sigh as he drops back down on the bed, body leaning forward with his face hidden in his hands.
“I didn’t sleep with her,” he mutters into his hands. “And I don’t know if it helps or hurts the situation to confess that I haven’t thought of anyone else but you since Friday.”
His face tilts up, his pretty blue eyes sincere and apologetic.
“I believe you,” I tell him and it’s the truth.
“I’m sorry.” He gives me a weak smile. “I get the feeling I’m going to be saying that a lot to you. I didn’t handle it right. I promise—”
I hold my hand up. “No more promises.”
He’s on his feet again, moving across the room and dropping to his knees in front of me. His fingers go right back under my chin when I try to look away. “I promise to do better.”
Those eyes of his drop right back down to my lips, and it’s like the proximity forces him to focus on them. He leans forward, and I just know he’s going to kiss me, and I’m not all that surprised that I plan to kiss him back.
But his lips land on my forehead, a quick peck before he pulls back, his thumb rubbing my cheek.
“How much sleep have you gotten since Saturday night?”
“Not much,” I confess, praying he can’t see the flash of disappointment in my eyes.
“Let’s take a nap,” he says, standing and going to the wide window and pulling the curtains closed.
I don’t immediately move, entranced by the way his button-down shirt clings to his muscles. It’s obvious he’s gotten more muscular since the last time he wore it, but there aren’t going to be any complaints springing from my lips.
“Come on,” he urges again, lying down on the bed and opening his arms.
I swipe my hands down my dress as I stand, both to straighten it and clear my palms of the sweat forming there. I don’t hesitate to crawl into the bed and let him roll against my back. I rest my head on the bicep he’s swept under my pillow and sigh a breath of contentment when his other arm wraps around my waist, the palm of his hand flat on the bed rather than tucked under my side. It’s like he knows exactly what my limits are, and he refuses to cross them. It’s tiny little actions and considerations like this that are dangerous. They make me trust him, make me want to believe in a future together.
I’m reminding myself just how dangerous this crush I’m starting to have on my husband is going to be as I fall asleep.
Chapter 14
Apollo
She’s languid against me, a dead weight while she sleeps. My arm fell asleep shortly after she put her head on it, but I haven’t moved an inch. That’s a lie. My upper body hasn’t moved an inch, but the lower half of me has grown by several.
I shift my hips back slightly—not for the first time—when a little groan leaves her lips. I’m curious what she’s dreaming about because my mind is going wild filling in those blanks.
I knew I seriously fucked up the second Grinch informed me that April had taken off after I got back from Nova’s apartment. I never thought she’d give me another chance. I wasn’t even convinced of it when she showed up at the magistrate’s office this morning.