“Not at all.” She shook her head. “Okay, maybe at first I had some concerns. N
ot about each of your skills, but whether or not you’d all be as committed to the company as I was.”
I supposed that made sense. This was her baby, whereas we were inheriting.
“In the end, it’s hard to leave it, not because I’m worried but because I feel like I’m abandoning my baby.”
My first thought was to agree with her. I couldn't imagine walking away from the work I was doing for Strong Incorporated now. But then I remembered that there was a time that I had considered abandoning my duty to the company. It had been four years ago while on a cruise with a woman who excited me beyond measure. It wasn't just the physical attraction, but everything about her had lit me up from the inside out. The day that cruise ended, I had seriously considered asking Jess to get off the ship with me, and we could go somewhere else to have an adventure. The only reason I hadn't was because she had vanished the morning after I spent the night with her, and I hadn't been able to locate her before we disembarked. That cruise had been my last hurrah before starting work at my grandmother's company, and I’d considered abandoning my duty for a woman.
Of course, remembering that, brought me back to yesterday, and the day before, and how distant Jess seemed to be this time around. I wished I knew what that was all about. Had she changed in the last four years? Was she seeing somebody and that's why she was working to put distance between us? Or was it really that she worked for my father?
Because I knew Noah had sensed something between me and Jess, I surreptitiously accessed the report he'd run on Jess when my father was hiring her as a physical therapist. It had been strange to read his report and learn things about her that I hadn't known, such as originally she'd been from the Midwest.
The report primarily focused on her education and skills, so there was nothing about her personal life, such as whether she was married or in a relationship. The only thing Noah had been able to note was that she lived with a housemate named Reggie, although the relationship between them wasn't in the report. That little bit didn’t sit with me well at all. The fact that jealousy consumed me, suggested that I had a thing for Jess all over again. Or, more likely, I'd never actually gotten over. Perhaps my not finding a compatible woman since her, was less about not meeting someone who shared my passion for adventure, and more about them not being Jess.
"Carter!"
I jerked out of my reverie at my grandmother's sharp tone. "What?"
Her eyes narrowed as she studied me. "Where have you been?"
I looked from her to Andi and then back to Gran again, not sure what she's asking. "Well, I just got in from Thailand —"
"No, not your travels, son, I mean just now. You weren't paying attention to a word I was saying."
Still not completely present, I said, "I met the woman I'm going to marry."
My grandmother's gray brows shot up to her hairline. Andi let out a gasp. It was only then I realized what I'd said.
"Who is this woman that you're marrying?" My grandmother asked.
I shook my head and then for good measure scraped my hands over my face so that I could be completely present. "Sorry. It's not like that, at least at this point. I don't know, there's just something about her. I can't get rid of the feeling that she's the one."
"Well, tell us who she is," Andi said impatiently.
"I'm not sure I should." I didn't want to get Jess in any trouble, considering she was so concerned about working for my father. On the other hand, I wasn't a man who kept his thoughts and feelings under wrap. It always seemed to me to be a waste of time to hide when letting out thoughts and feelings was a much quicker way to get things done. I believed that now more than ever since the one time I did keep my thoughts and feelings to myself, I lost Jess.
"It's dad's physical therapist, Jess."
Gran and Andi looked at each other for a moment and then back at me, their expressions confused.
"I didn't even know you'd met her," Andi said. “Noah always said you weren't around when she was there. Was a bone of contention for him for a while." She looked in thought as if she was remembering something. "Although recently he did withdraw that."
It was probably because he’d noticed my reaction to her. "This isn't the first time I've met her. Four years ago, just before I came on board here actually, I took an adventure cruise through Mexico, and I met her there. It was a shipboard romance that, to be honest, I've always regretted letting her get away from me. But at the time we were caught up in the romance of it all that we kept so much of ourselves to ourselves. By the time I realized that I cared for her, the ship docked and she was gone and I had no way to find her again."
Andi sighed. "That's so romantic. So, was she surprised to see you again? Are the two of you back together?"
I shook my head. “No, we’re not together. She's concerned because she works for dad and doesn't want to do anything improper. But I'll admit, I want to find out if we still have something."
My grandmother's expression was a mixture of happiness, yet concern. "I'm glad to see you thinking like this Carter, because to be honest, I was little concerned your wanderlust might keep you from enjoying the fruits of having a family or take your focus off the business. I do want to give you a word of advice, if I may."
I nodded. "Of course," I said, never the one to pass up words of wisdom from my brilliant grandmother.
"Sometimes things aren't always as they seem. Our memories often have a way of deceiving us into thinking of the past as perfection, whereas out in the real world, it may not be. Now that doesn't mean that I'm saying this situation with you and your father's physical therapist shouldn't be pursued, but I am saying that you have to be careful that you don't let memories or a fantasy get in the way of what's real. And you have to remember that reality is often so much better than a fantasy, although sometimes it may not feel that way."
I wasn't quite sure what she was getting at, except to say that Jess and my relationship before wasn't set in reality, and that real life might show us that we were not compatible after all. That had been one of the reasons that we had kept her personal details to herself, because we had wanted a fantasy.
Even so, I knew my feelings were real then and now, and I figured I had a month to try and find out if I could rekindle and then build on what had started four years ago. To do that I'd have to defy Jess’s wishes to not pursue her because of my father. But I was an adventurer, and never let obstacles get in my way. Yes, of course I would always respect her, but if there was a way that I could alleviate her concern about my father being her boss, I was going to do it. And then I was going to pursue her hard and fast.