"You’ll get no argument from me." I started to shut the door.
His hand came up, pressing against the door to keep me from slamming it in his face again. "Please give me a chance to talk to you. I know I'm not doing a very good job of it. Give me a few minutes to get it all out and then if you want me to leave, I will."
I wished my resolve was stronger than the yearning in my heart. Because my resolve wanted to tell him no and shut the door. But my heart had me opening the door and letting him in. I didn't offer him anything to drink or eat. I just went over to my couch and sat down.
He walked in and looked around my apartment, his eyes stopping at my sheet-covered studio. A look of shame came to his face, and that made me feel a little bit triumphant.
He came around in front of my couch and coffee table and began to pace. "I'm sorry." He stopped pacing and turned to look at me. "I'm sorry." He said again. "I know this media fuckup isn’t your fault. I know my behavior is too reprehensible to forgive, so I won't even bother asking for forgiveness. But I did want to let you know that I'm truly sorry, and I'm ashamed for how I treated you."
I studied his face closely to see the truth of his words. I saw it in his eyes. He meant every word and while that did loosen some of the anger tightening in my chest, it didn't completely let my guard down.
I knew it was time for both of us to go our own ways, and the only way that either of us could be truly free of the other would be if I did forgive him. "I forgive you Hunter. And now we can both just go on with our lives."
I expected him to have an expression of relief and then leave. Instead, he looked more desperate.
"Can I tell you a story?" he asked.
"Will it help us get closure on this whole thing?"
"Yes. Maybe." He looked down. "I don't know, but I'd like to tell you anyway, if I could."
"Sure, okay." I found it odd that I was the one having to help him alleviate his guilt and pain, when I had been his victim. Then again, if this is what needed to happen to get him walking out my door, I would listen.
He paced again for a minute and then he surprised me by walking over towards me, sitting on the coffee table directly in front of me. He was too close, so I leaned back on the couch.
"I was in love once before. Or at least I thought I was."
I arched a brow, surprised by this confession.
"I met her my junior year of college and she was what you would expect; tall, beautiful, she could've been a model, maybe."
I smirked, and was about to tell him that hearing about his beautiful model girlfriend wasn't exactly the type of thing that was going to make me feel better about him. But he looked down and ran his hand over his face, making me realize that whatever was going to happen in the story, it wasn't easy for him to tell.
"I haven't really told anybody about all this. Anyway, I was pretty sure that I loved her and that she loved me too, and so as our senior year came to an end, and we'd been seeing each other for almost two years, I figured we should get married."
My other brow arched as the idea of Hunter getting married just didn't jive with what I knew about him.
"I bought the biggest ring that my trust fund would allow me to spend, and I made arrangements to set us up in a really nice condo on the beach and bought her car — "
"You did all that just to propose?"
He shrugged and a blush came to his cheeks. "I wanted her to say yes."
“It doesn't sound like you were sure that you loved her, or she loved you."
He rubbed his hands on his thighs. "You're getting ahead in the story here."
"Sorry." I began to realize that this was a story of heartbreak. Hunter was being as vulnerable as I'd ever seen him. Maybe it was as vulnerable as he’d ever been, excep
t perhaps when he asked this woman to marry him. Once again, my heart began to soften towards him.
"So, I made this whole big thing about proposing and she said yes," he said.
"She said yes?" I thought this was going to be a story about heartbreak.
"She said yes, and at that time I didn't think I could ever be happier, and we moved forward with graduation and planning a wedding, and a future together."
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat because I didn't like that there was a woman that made Hunter the happiest he'd ever been.