Fifteen minutes later, we were seated in a restaurant down the street from the office, having ordered wine and reviewing the menu. It felt a whole like a date, but I pushed that aside. She’d agreed to friends with benefits.
“I’m sorry I didn’t let you know I was back,” I said.
She looked down like she didn’t want me to see that it had bothered her. “You have a lot on your plate.”
I reached over and took her hand. “You helped me a lot by being there when I called. I just…well…you see what happens when I’m around you.”
She smiled but it didn’t quite reach her eyes making me wonder if maybe this friends-with-benefits agreement wasn’t a good idea. Or maybe she was offended that all I want
ed was sex.
“Have I said something wrong?” I asked.
“No. I just…I care about you Cy. As a friend,” she added quickly. “I know that you have a lot going on and there’s no reason you should be concerned about me. It’s selfish of me…” She shook her head. “Never mind.”
“No, I want to hear what you have to say.” I leaned back as the waitress brought us each a glass of wine.
When the waitress left, Petal continued. “I just…I felt unimportant when I heard you were back for days and you hadn’t been down for a cupcake or called. I thought we were friends…it’s silly. I feel selfish for even putting this on you.”
“I’m sorry. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you. You are important.” But she messed with my senses and sometimes I couldn’t deal with it. Even more disconcerting was the intense need I felt for her. I couldn’t very well tell her that.
“I’m not asking you to be accountable to me. You have no obligation to call. I just…I thought we were friends—”
“We are. I just…” I tapped my temple. “I’m not thinking straight up here all the time.”
“And this is making it worse. I don’t want that. Just know that I’m here for you if you need me.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that.”
“How is your mom?”
I took a long drink of my wine, wishing I’d opted for something stronger. “It’s going to be a long, difficult road. It’s hard to be here knowing this will take a lot out of her.”
“Is there something I can help with?”
I believed she really wanted to help. She wasn’t just giving me lip service. It made me wish I could be better for her. “Just being here is helpful.”
She looked down again. “Will you be moving back to Chicago?”
My eyes narrowed wondering why she’d ask that. “Did someone tell you that?”
“April said you might telecommute.”
I understood that Jude would talk to his wife about business-related news, but I’m sure it went further. He’d tell her all my business. And she’d tell Petal. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.
“It’s been mentioned as a possibility. I haven’t ruled it out, but I haven’t made a decision either.”
“I know if one of my parents was sick, it would be hard not to be with them all the time,” she said.
“She doesn’t want to interrupt my life. That’s what she said.”
“Sounds like a mom thing to say.”
I nodded. “At least I have someone I trust looking after her while I’m here. That’s a big relief.” I opted not to tell her it was Lora. Petal had said I had no obligation to her, but it didn’t feel right to mention I’d enlisted the help of my ex to the woman I’d just had sex with, and if the night went well, I’d have sex with again.
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“I’ll still have to fly home frequently, but for now I’m planning to stay here.”