But that didn’t mean it hurt any less to drive away from him. I was only halfway down the mountain to town when I realized I would do just about anything to shield Finn Heller from more pain.
And three days later, that included putting my job at risk.
18
Finn
There was something magically healing about sleeping in the arms of the sheriff of Aster Valley. Or maybe it was simply being in his big bed at his blessedly peaceful and silent house.
We’d left the chalet bedroom for my mother and escaped to Declan’s house the night of the accident. I’d never been more grateful the chalet only had one bedroom.
Being at Declan’s place made me feel almost like a normal person. His home was nothing fancy, a rental he was in for a year before making the decision of whether and where he might want to invest in his own place. I hadn’t been in such a homey place in a very long time. My own place was modern and cold, decorated by professionals my mom had hired in case I was ever interviewed there for a magazine spread.
It only took a few hours that first night before I’d changed into comfy pajamas and joined Tessa to watch an old BBC show called Doc Martin.
“This is nice but…” I began.
“Slow as shit?” she asked, reaching for the bowl of baby carrots on the coffee table. “I’m no longer allowed to watch shows that raise my blood pressure. It was either this or Gilmore Girls, and I can’t handle parent/child relationship stories right now without snot-crying.”
“Don’t get me wrong,” I said, reaching for the other bowl that held pretzels. “I like this. It’s nice. I’m a big BBC fan.” I took a bite of the pretzel and made a retching noise.
“Those don’t have salt on them,” she said. “I meant to warn you.”
“They taste like…” The pretzel equivalent of Doc Martin. “Saltless pretzels,” I finished lamely.
“Complain to your boyfriend. They were his idea. He took my high blood pressure personally.”
My boyfriend. I quickly turned around to see if Declan had overheard her. What would his reaction be to the label? What was my reaction?
Soul-deep longing.
When I realized he was still in the kitchen cleaning up from dinner, I cleared my throat and took a sip from the glass of ice water Declan made sure I always had available. “I’ve never had a boyfriend before,” I admitted.
Declan had once muttered that I was the king of the slow-pan, but I had nothing on this woman. Her head turned slowly to gawp at me.
“You, Finn Heller, Hollywood heartthrob and world’s most eligible bachelor, have never had a boyfriend?”
I shot her a look. “I’ve had dates. I’ve had hookups. That’s not the same thing as having a boyfriend.”
Tessa studied me. Even though she looked tired, she was absolutely gorgeous. I could understand why some straight men had a thing for pregnant women. There was something about her that made me want to be close to her. Maybe it was a biological need to protect her or something, but I felt the same warmth of affection when I looked at her that Declan must feel.
“Why didn’t any of your dates turn into boyfriends?” she asked.
“Let’s see… first there was Kix, who I didn’t want to date because he felt like more of a brother to me.” Not a very good one, but the kind you were competitive with, annoyed by, and low-key didn’t like. “Then there was a guy named Dalvin, who wanted me to call him Dungeon Master Dalvin. Which is fine. I’m not kink-shaming or anything, but it wasn’t my thing. Then I dated a guy named Lex, who tipped off the press about where we would be so they could capture our date on film. Then… oh, Drew Hilliard from that reality show. He was actually super sweet until I discovered he had a girlfriend. And then there was—”
Tess held up a hand. “I get it. You date assholes.”
Declan had been in the middle of walking into the room when he heard her and froze midstep. His eyes bounced to mine.
“Not you,” I said quickly. “You’re not an asshole.”
Tessa started laughing while Dec’s brows furrowed. “Uh… thanks? You set a low bar, Finn.”
I sighed. “I have a regrettable history with men.”
Dec’s eyes widened, and I cursed, reaching out to grasp his hand. “Not you. Jesus. I blame all of this on Tess.”
He grinned and joined me on the sofa, snuggling close until I was practically sprawled on top of him. “That’s what I like to do, too.”
Tessa threw a pillow at him.
It took all of five seconds for me to fall asleep to the opening sequence of the next Doc Martin episode. At some point Declan must have helped me upstairs because I woke up in his bed, not only refreshed, but also remarkably horny for someone who’d been used as a human battering ram the day before.