“Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry,” I began, before looking up to see that it was Aiden. “What’re you doing here?” I blurted.
His handsome face widened into a smile, but there was a hint of insecurity in it I wasn’t expecting. He’d always come across as an extremely confident guy.
“Actually, I wanted to talk to you for a minute. Do you mind taking a walk with me?”
Unease coiled in my gut as I wondered what his intentions were. Was he planning on asking me out? Did he want to find out where I lived? My hesitation must have shown because he stepped back and pressed his gloved hands together in front of himself as if to assure me he wasn’t going to touch me.
Aiden softened his smile. “Ash, just a few minutes, please. See that little city park across the street? I just thought we could walk over there to get off the busy sidewalk.”
I nodded and followed him to the little open area that was covered in the dirty remnants of snow and fractured shadows of bare tree branches trembling in the weak winter sunlight. As soon as we were off the street and through the iron gates, the noises of the city dimmed. Pigeons searched the ground near a trash bin and an older couple stood waiting for a pair of dogs to do their business on a patch of dead grass.
Aiden looked like he was about to say something, but my beeping phone interrupted him, and I quickly reached into my pocket to search out my pills. Luckily, they were small enough to take without needing water, though it certainly wasn’t my preference.
“What are those?” Aiden asked as his eyes fell on the prescription bottle in my hand. He seemed to catch himself because he shook his head and said, “Sorry— it’s none of my business.”
“It’s okay,” I said. “I, um, have a heart condition,” I explained. I wasn’t sure why I didn’t want to tell him the actual truth. Maybe because I didn’t want him to look at me with pity or something, I wasn’t sure.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his eyes narrowing with worry.
I nodded. “Yeah, it… it was tough for a while, but I’m good now,” I hedged. Tough didn’t even begin to explain what it had actually been like, but I found myself not wanting to dwell on the past. I wanted to focus on the man in front of me. The man who’d suddenly gone uncharacteristically silent on me.
“I have something that I think might belong to you,” Aiden finally began, his voice low and quiet.
I looked over at him in surprise, but he was facing away from me.
“What is it?” I asked when he seemed reluctant to continue.
He turned back to look at me, face pinched with concern. “I didn’t know it was yours. I didn’t know whose it was, but I should have turned it in right away, regardless.” He began babbling as he pulled a familiar red journal from his inside coat pocket.
My first reaction was sudden joy. He’d found it! He’d found the last connection to my parents, the scribbles and thoughts of the past several years, the bits and pieces of song lyrics I’d daydreamed about using in the future. But then I realized that he’d found it. He’d found my most secret collection of thoughts and feelings. The words I didn’t dare let another soul on earth discover.
I glanced up at him accusingly.
“Tell me you didn’t read it.”
I couldn’t stand the idea that Aiden Vale, of all people, would know what a weakling I was. That he would know I was a chickenshit who let people use me. That I wrote shitty-ass lyrics in a pathetic attempt to be some kind of musician someday.
“Aiden, please,” I begged, not really understanding why it was so important to me. He was a stranger, after all. Who cared if he’d read it? He didn’t know me. “Please tell me you didn’t read it.”
Chapter 5
Aiden
I couldn’t stand the look on Ash’s face, but what was even worse was the sound of his voice as he begged me to lie to him. I couldn’t do it.
“I’m sorry,” I said quietly. “I didn’t mean to, really. At first—”
I didn’t get the rest of the words out before Ash was lunging forward to grab the journal out of my hand. His foot slipped on the icy pavement and he crashed into me. My arms went around him quickly to keep both of us upright, and we found ourselves nose-to-nose in an embrace. He smelled like coffee and pastries and I found myself leaning in to nuzzle my nose into his neck in search of more of that tantalizing scent. But I quickly remembered how skittish he was and how absolutely freaked he’d be if I dared initiate anything physical between us. I carefully grasped his arms and set him back on his feet, only releasing my grip once I knew he was steady.