Xander drew me back behind the tree as Lucky walked back towards camp. I ended up standing closer to Xander than I realized, and when I looked up at him once Lucky was out of sight, I knew he was feeling the same thing as me. Had it really been less than twenty-four hours since he’d had me pressed up against a tree just like this one, his thick length buried deep inside my body?
“So, um, yeah, that’s new,” Xander said as he motioned to the spot Lucky and Calvin had been.
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“Was that what you wanted to talk to me about?”
“What?” I asked.
“Earlier when we saw the bears. You took Calvin aside and then said you might need my advice.”
“Oh, yeah,” I said. “I mean, no, not that exactly.” I sucked in a breath and took a few more steps back to put some space between us so I could think more clearly. “Calvin said something today, but I’m not sure if I should believe it. But after seeing that,” I said as I motioned to the tree Calvin had had Lucky pressed up against, “I’m thinking maybe he was telling the truth.”
“What did he say?”
“He said Lucky’s foster parents were hurting him. Abusing him.” Even the thought had me wanting to go find Lucky and force him to tell me the truth. “But I know Ed and Gloria… they’re good people. At least, I thought they were.”
“Did you talk to Lucky about it? Has he ever even hinted that something could be wrong?”
“No,” I began, but then a memory popped into my head.
“What?” Xander asked gently and I felt his hand close over my arm.
“A few weeks ago, he had a bruise on his stomach. I only saw it because we were playing basketball and his shirt rode up when he was taking a shot. He said he got it during gym. I… I didn’t have any reason to think he wasn’t telling me the truth.” I shook my head. “A few nights before we left to come out here, he asked if he could spend the night at my house. I thought he just wanted to talk about the trip because he was so excited and he liked going over the maps Gary sent us… I told him yes, but that I had to work late and I couldn’t pick him up until after dinner. He told me never mind and then changed the subject.”
I looked at Xander. “He wanted me to pick him up from school. What if he didn’t want to go home, Xander? What if I missed something and he—”
“Don’t,” Xander cut in and then both of his hands curled around my upper arms. “Don’t do that to yourself, Bennett. If something did happen, there was no way you could have known.”
Bile rose in my throat as I began questioning more and more encounters I’d had with Lucky where he’d been acting strangely. Either quieter than usual or he’d been moving slower. What if he’d been hiding something each time? Like the bruise I’d seen on his stomach.
“Oh God.”
“Bennett, look at me.”
I shook my head as I tried to pull free of him. “I missed it,” I whispered, in disbelief. I began struggling violently against Xander’s hold. “Let me go! I have to talk to him.” I could feel hot tears starting to slide down my face, but I didn’t care. My only thought was to get to Lucky. “Xander, let go!” I yelled. “I have to help him!”
“Baby, stop,” Xander said firmly as he turned us so that my back was to the tree. “You need to calm down.”
“No! He needs me!”
“He’s safe, Bennett.” He gave me a little shake and said, “He’s safe.”
The reminder helped my racing heart start to slow, but the shame quickly took over and coursed through me like a living thing. “I failed him, Xander. He trusted me to protect him and I failed him.”
“No, baby, you didn’t,” Xander whispered and then he was tugging me forward. His arms went around me and I felt his lips skim my temple.
“I don’t know what to do,” I admitted. My insides felt like they’d been scraped raw.
“You’re going to help him, Benny,” Xander murmured against my ear. “Because that’s what you do.” His hand came up to hold the back of my head, and I just stood there and soaked in the comfort he was offering. When I finally felt like I could breathe again, I pulled back.
“I need to talk to him.”
“I know you do, but can I suggest something?”
I nodded and looked up at him.
“Give him this trip. Let him have the next few days where he doesn’t have to think about the shit back home. You guys will have a couple days at the lodge before you have to go home. On the last day, talk to him. That will give you time to figure things out. What to say, who you’ll need to talk to about what happens next.”