He stared at me.
Then he asked, “Sorry?”
Yes, this was what I was afraid of.
He didn’t understand.
I set about explaining.
“You see, there will be questions, and I’ve no doubt, there already are, and Mary is holding back the tide. We’ll need to talk with our families, our friends, so they’re aware and not blindsided, and then decide when we allow the statement to be released that yes, indeed, Imogen Swan and Duncan Holloway are an item. Then, I hope, there will come a time when we’ll be ‘official.’ And the time where we declare we’re ‘serious.’ And…uh, so on.”
It took him a moment before he said, “How ’bout this? We do whatever we want, and your publicist, and mine, ’cause River Rain’s got one, though she is not personal to me, she can be briefed, and when they get these requests, they can say, ‘Ms. Swan and Mr. Holloway do not discuss their private lives.’”
“Darling,” I whispered carefully, “that does not work.”
“How does it not?”
“That feeds the fire.”
“So what?”
“Bowie.”
“Is it their business?”
“Well, no,” I allowed.
“And is it gonna affect us? And I mean really affect us, Gen. People are gonna take pictures. They’re gonna post them. You warned me they come up to you, and I can imagine they do. The touching part will stop, if I’m around, but you gotta take care of your fans as you see fit. That’s part of your job. So all that’s going to happen no matter what. But we pay these people, the publicists, to handle shit, and eventually, folks are just gonna get it. We don’t have to spoonfeed them. We don’t have to make decisions that are personal and private and then share how we feel. I’ve no doubt you got a lot of money and that makes your life very comfortable. These people gave you that life by watchin’ your TV show and goin’ to see your movies. So there is definitely a way that you owe them your kindness and attention. But you don’t owe them your life.”
“It’s a little ridiculous how much sense that makes,” I muttered.
He smiled smugly.
I wasn’t feeling smug.
“We should talk about the other, Bowie.”
“The other what?”
“You, well…me being in your face and not in your life and how that had to feel.”
He turned into me, lifting his foot from the floor so he could tangle his legs with mine and wrapping both his arms around me.
“Right, I have not watched any of your movies or Rita’s Way. I couldn’t. It would have killed. And I didn’t need my wife seein’ that. And she knew about you.”
“Oh boy.”
I knew how that was.
I knew because Tom knew about Duncan too. I’d told him before we were married, when we were sharing about lovers past. And when River Rain got bigger, and Duncan was the face of it, and Tom didn’t miss that, he didn’t handle it very well.
I didn’t blame him.
They looked alike. They were both sporty, outdoorsy, even if in different ways, and they were both committed to causes that meant something to them.
Duncan, the environment.
Tom, the proper care and treatment of younger athletes in competition (suffice it to say, when the Larry Nassar scandal broke, Tom hit the roof, as anyone would, but Tom took it as almost a personal affront, but then, he had two daughters, and at the time Sasha was seriously into beach volleyball).
He got over his jealous spate toward Duncan, and it wasn’t difficult for him to do so, but it was rocky for a spell.
“Yeah,” Duncan grunted, bringing me back to our conversation. “And I did not know, until yesterday, that was an issue because she never told me.”
I grew tense and repeated, “Oh boy.”
He pulled me closer, not that there was much closer to get, but he managed it.
“She and I are done, baby,” he said gently. “We are, and there’s no going back. But just to say, if she had an issue, she should have told me. That’s on her. A lot of it is on her, but how ’bout for now, we deal with stuff that involves you and me. Not Dora. Not Corey. Just where we are and where we’re goin’ and not try to tackle all of it, which is impossible, but it would be unsettling, and I don’t wanna feel unsettled. I have a spell where I can feel good I got my Genny back in my arms. And that’s all I wanna feel. For now. You with me?”
I knew a thing or two about a partner not sharing something they should share.
And now was not the time to get into that.
Now was the time to be happy I had Duncan back.
So I nodded exuberantly.
“Good,” he murmured, his gaze dropping to my mouth.
I wanted his kiss.
However…
“Bowie,” I called.
His eyes came back to mine.
“Right. Plan. Hear me out,” he stated.