I grab a couple of bags of breast milk from the freezer that will also serve as ice packs and toss in a few jars of baby food. It’s overkill, but that’s just me. That’s who I am. I toss in several clean bottles so that all I have to do is pour the milk inside. I have four bottles in the fridge, so I take those as well, just to be safe. After adding a few ice packs and double-checking I have everything, I zip up the bag and set it on the floor next to the diaper bag.
As for me, I make sure I have my wallet, my phone, and my sunglasses, and I’m good to go. I won’t be swimming, and it's summertime so I seriously doubt I’m going to need any additional clothes as night falls. I should probably put a little more effort into my appearance, but I don’t have the energy. Lucky my hair is short and layered, so it always lays well. I’ve been blessed in the hair department. I always seem to have this beachy wave thing going on, and I don’t hate it.
I’m wearing a tank top and cutoff jean shorts, and I’ll slip my feet into some flip-flops. This is me. This is who I am, and not once have any of the girls ever made me feel bad about it. Hell, they’re all usually dressed very similar to me. Amazingly, I just fit with them.
Madeline begins to stir, which tells me that naptime is over. I’m grateful because I need to run, well, walk to the pharmacy and grab some sunscreen for her. The thought of packing her down all those stairs, only to pack her back up and then down again right after, doesn’t sound appealing to me at all. Maybe Aspen won’t mind stopping.
Grabbing my phone, I call her.
“Hey. I just left my place.”
“We’re ready. I have a favor to ask.”
“Sure. What’s up?”
“Do you mind stopping after you pick us up so I can buy some sunscreen for Maddie? I have some, but the bottle is almost empty.”
“Sure, but you won’t need to. Lena, that’s the boys’ mom, my future mother-in-law, she keeps stocked on all of that for everyone, but especially the grandkids. And there are plenty of places to keep the littles out of the sun. Lena and Stanley took care of that as soon as they found out Owen and Layla were expecting Carter. There’s a pavilion, I guess you would call it, as well as the gazebo.”
“Wow. Okay, well, if you’re sure.”
“I’m positive. Look, I know you don’t know much about the Riggins family, but they’re well-off. They take family seriously, and I promise you that you and Maddie are welcome. I wouldn’t put you in a position where you wouldn’t be.”
“Thank you.” I don’t know what else to say to that. I’ve been going at life all alone except for Carrie, who works her tail off, so I don’t get to see her as often as we like. This is all new to me, having people in my corner.
“You bet. I’ll come up and help you carry everything down.”
“Absolutely not. I’m packed. We’re going to head down now so you don’t have to wait on us.”
“I can help carry a diaper bag.”
“But you don’t need the trek up and down the flights of stairs.”
“The exercise will do me some good.”
“Save it.”
“You did it.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you did it while you were pregnant.”
“I didn’t, actually. I moved into this place when Maddie was about two months old.”
“Oh, I didn’t realize.”
“It’s a long story, but I’ll fill you in some time.”
“I’d like that. I’ll see you soon.”
“Bye.”
“All right, missy, are you ready for a day at the lake?” My daughter coos at me like she’s excited. “Well, Mommy’s not sure what I’m getting us into. I apologize if this is a boring day for you.” She just smiles and blows bubbles, and my heart trips over in my chest. I love this little girl with everything inside me. Travis left me with the most amazing gift. When I miss him, I think about Madeline; I will always have a part of him with me.
After getting Madeline strapped into her seat, I put the backpack on my back, shove my purse into the diaper bag, and sling it over my shoulder. “Let’s do this,” I tell my daughter, tickling her belly. She rewards me with a grin.
By the time I reach the main level of my building, I feel like I’ve ran a damn marathon. When I step outside, the heat of the day hits me, and I debate my sanity for agreeing to spend the day at the lake with my almost-six-months-old daughter. I have no idea what I was thinking agreeing to this. It’s going to be hot, and she and I are both going to be miserable. I’m thinking about calling Aspen to cancel when she pulls in front of my building in her SUV.