“I won’t sleep with you. If this is about sex, I’m not fucking you.”
“Don’t worry, sweetheart, I have no problem doing all the fucking.”
I pushed him as hard as I could, and he didn’t move an inch. He was a cement block, fueling my fury like he was nothing more than the gasoline to my flames.
“So this is about sex? We’re long past that. I’m here as your publicist—nothing more, nothing less. You need to get that through your thick, stubborn skull. I’ll tell you this, though… I find it hilarious I spent most of my teenage years trying to get you to notice me, and I’ve gone from the girl you didn’t want, to the one you can’t have. How’s that for irony?”
“I always wanted you, kid.”
“You had a shitty way of showing it. But come on, you can’t be that hard up for someone to ride your cock, Julian. Just call Katie or whatever bimbo you have on speed dial. You never had a problem parading your hookups around me before, so why stop now?”
“If you’re going to bring up the past, then I insist we talk about you and me and forget about the rest.”
“How convenient. There is no you and me, and there never was.”
“That’s bullshit, and you know it. I’m not playing your little games, Autumn.”
“You’re not playing my little games?” I repeated, offended. “Holy shit! You’re the king of playing games!”
“I’m not that man anymore.”
“And I’m just supposed to believe you? After everything you did to me?”
“If I could go back, I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I made something of myself. I wasn’t the man you needed then, but I am now.”
“Now? After all this time? Do you actually think I’m just going to jump into your arms like nothing ever happened? You have no idea what I went through after you left! It took me years to mend my broken heart and the damage you did to my brother and parents. My family and I were devastated, not to mention worried sick about you for years! We didn’t know where you were or what you were doing. You didn’t call, write, or text—fucking nothing! You didn’t do anything but disappear on us! After everything they did for you, that’s how you repaid them?! You’re nothing but a selfish prick with control issues, Mr. Locke, so get off your high horse. You’re not getting a damn thing from me!” I sidestepped him to leave. “We’re done here!”
He grabbed my arm, making me face him again. “We’re not done until I say we are.” Looking deep into my eyes, he reminded, “You’re my number one girl, remember?”
“How could I forget? It was just another lie you told me.”
“No.” He shook his head. “You know that’s not true. I never lied to you. It’s why I pushed you away to begin with. I couldn’t lie to you.”
“You could bold-face lie to me right now, and I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. You’re a businessman. You have people believe what you want them to. It’s why you’re so successful. Trust me, you spent years practicing on me.”
“You want a confession?” he challenged, getting close to my face. His eyes were in a craze. “I’ll give you a fucking confession. The only times I ever lied to you was when I told you I fucked someone else.”
I didn’t just jerk back, I stumbled. “What?”
“You heard me. I didn’t fuck anyone at Christian’s bachelor party.”
“But … Christian… No way. He said you did, and everyone that was there said you went into the bedroom with the stripper.”
“I let them believe that.”
“Why?”
“Your brother was getting suspicious of us, kid.”
He was?
I opened my mouth to reply, but I couldn’t get my lips to move.
“You were never just a fuck. I told you that to make you hate me.”
“Well, mission accomplished. Why would you want me to hate you?”
“It was the only way I could leave you.”
I promised myself I wouldn’t go down this road with him. Bringing up the past wouldn’t change what he did, what he put me through.
Our memories became nightmares.
My love that became hate.
It. Ruined. Me.
He ruined me.
That fateful day he shattered my heart and then walked away, leaving me to pick up the pieces of what was left in his wake. I desperately tried to focus on all the pain he’d caused, not wanting to care about his lies and truths. Yet there I was hanging on by a thread, anxiously awaiting his next words.
“And the only other time I’ve ever lied to you...”
I never expected what he admitted next, and it felt as though I was holding my breath.
With the utmost sincere expression on his face, he declared, “Was when I told you I didn’t love you.”
Chapter NINE
—Autumn—
Then
We walked into the rodeo, hand-in-hand, while I looked for my brother in the stands. Daniel and I had been hanging out for the last few weeks, and we were meeting him there. He was a senior, and I was a junior in high school. I was almost seventeen, and my parents had finally started allowing me to date.