My best friend sighs dramatically.
“It’s Dominic, and he’s fine, but I’m thinking of ditching him.”
My eyebrows furrow as I take a bite of my burger.
“What? Why? I thought you guys only started dating, and you were really excited about him!”
My friend sighs dramatically again.
“It’s the guys at Northern High,” she whines. “I thought Dominic would be rough and tough because he plays football for Northern, but you know they’re like a pee-wee league. I want a guy who’s big, bold, and fast too. I want him to deliver.”
I giggle a bit.
“Really? Are you trying to tell me something? There were a lot of double entendres just now.”
April rolls her eyes.
“Well, I’m just saying. Big is what I like, and I can’t handle below-average tiny tots. I guess I’ll have to stick with the selection at Monroe, although our fellow students are pretty hopeless,” she says, gazing about morosely. “Look at this crowd of nerds.”
“Hey, we’re nerds too!” I protest.
April nods, brown curls bobbling.
“Yes, but we’re not nerdy like that. I mean, we’re not saving ourselves for Prince Charming or anything. We’re sassy girls who like to go out and explore!”
I giggle.
“You’re right. Maybe we should head into Manhattan for some clubbing, and see if we can meet some hot guys,” I say hopefully.
April merely shakes her head dejectedly.
“No, I’m grounded again. My mom caught me looking at this firefighter calendar, and she was so scandalized. She says I have to come straight home for the next month to focus on my moral standards.”
My face scrunches in confusion.
“A firefighter calendar? But that’s hardly risqué. I mean, sure they’re covered in oil, but usually it’s just bare-chested guys, right?”
April nods.
“Plus, the calendar I was looking at is firefighters with their dogs, so a lot of them were posing with really cute puppies. But you know my mom. She’s so square that even one square inch of gleaming male chest throws her into a tizzy.”
I giggle because my parents are old-fashioned too, and it can get really annoying. But the thought of Mrs. Forsythe losing it over bare-chested firemen holding puppies is just too ridiculous not to laugh.
“Speaking of firemen,” I begin.
April perks up.
“Yeah?”
I grin.
“Well, you know that we have a new neighbor right? Carl Jager? He’s a fireman.”
April tries to think for a moment, her expression confused. Then she shakes her head.
“Sorry, girlfriend. I don’t recall seeing him around the neighborhood.”
I grin sassily again.
“Well, you’d remember him if you saw because this guy is H-O-T. He’s probably six two with black hair, blue eyes, and an incredible build. He must work out three times a day. That’s what firefighters do when they’re not busy fighting fires, right? They work out at the firehouse gym.”
April nods solemnly.
“Hell yeah. Plus, being in shape is important for the job! But why are you bringing Carl Jager up? Did you get a chance to talk to him?”
I shake my head.
“No, but let’s just say I discovered some really interesting information. I overheard Cindy McAdams in the women’s restroom, and she said he’s huge!”
April looks incensed.
“How does she know? OMG, has she gone out with him? That bitch!”
I raise my hand, giggling.
“No, but I guess her older sister has. You remember Karen McAdams? She’s a few years older than us, and I think she’s at Monroe Community College this year. But Cindy said Karen went on a date with a guy named Carl and was literally limping afterwards. It was that big.”
April’s eyes go wide.
“Holy shit. OMG, this is so insane. But how do you know if it’s the same Carl who’s your neighbor?”
I grin.
“I don’t. But I want to find out.” April squeals then and I hush her while looking around the cafeteria. “Shh! I don’t want anyone to know.”
“OMG!” my buddy cries out before clapping her hands over her mouth. “This is the day I’ve been waiting for! Colleen Weston becomes a seductress. Yee-haw!”
I can’t help but laugh because I don’t consider myself sexy or seductive at all. But April leans forward, her eyes aglow.
“So, how are you going to win Carl’s heart?”
I giggle. “I didn’t say I was going to win his heart. Please girlfriend. I just want a place in his bed.”
She squeals even louder this time.
“OMG, you’re so bad, and I love it! You’re Bad Girl CoCo, like how Rihanna is Bad Girl RiRi. So what’s the plan?”
I shrug naughtily.
“Well, I don’t exactly have one yet. I just heard the rumors myself.”
April nods quickly.
“Well, I’m in this a thousand percent behind you, BadGirl CoCo. You’re finally leaving your comfort zone, and you know that’s really important for personal growth!”
I stifle a giggle again.
“Personal growth? Hon, I don’t think that’s what I’m focused on at all.”
But April merely leans forward, speaking in an excited whisper.
“You’ll think of a way. I know you will, Bad Girl CoCo. When you feel yourself melting with excitement, just go with it. Lean in. Do that weird MBA thing where they tell you to ‘disrupt and innovate.’”