God, this is so hard. Give me the strength to do what’s right for him.
“Don’t do this, Malyshka. I thought you and Alexei were getting along.”
We are. We bonded a hell of a lot when Demitri got shot. That night we sat next to Demitri, fearing for the worst, it changed things between Alexei and me. Since then, he’s treated me like a little sister and not like I’m a threat to Demitri. Even though I am.
“It’s not that I don’t get along with Alexei. I just don’t want to share the man I’m supposed to be in a relationship with.”
If he doesn’t fall for this lie, I don’t know what I’ll do.
Demitri shakes his head, his eyes intense on me. “Stop, Ariana. You’re not a selfish person. Why are you really doing this?”
I close my eyes, unable to feel his breath on my face and look at him, without breaking down and begging him to never let me go.
Pulling back again, I force the words out, “You don’t know me as well as you think you do. I stuck it out with you because Yuri was trying to kill me. I really appreciate all you’ve done, but it’s all over now. There’s no reason for me to be here.”
Still, Demitri doesn’t believe me, and he gives me a look of warning. “Stop this shit.”
“It’s not shit,” I cry, my emotions bubbling over. Sticking as close to the truth as possible without telling Demitri the real reason, I scream, “I’m scared! You terrify me.”
His features soften instantly, and once again, he closes the distance between us and wraps his arms tightly around me. He presses a kiss to the side of my head. “I’d never hurt you. You have to know that after everything we’ve been through.”
“You live this insane life where you’re being shot at and killing people.” In a moment of weakness, I press closer to him, just wanting to stay in his arms. “You’re intense, and it overwhelms me. I can’t think straight long enough to figure out how I feel about you. It’s too much. All the time.”
It’s not. I love every minute with you. I’d give anything for a chance to stay with you, but not at the expense of your life.
I shut my eyes as I tell my biggest lie, “I don’t even know if what I feel for you is real or just a bad case of Stockholm syndrome.”
Demitri’s arms tighten around me, and then he presses another kiss to my temple before he pulls back to meet my eyes. “Then take some time to figure that out.”
“I can’t do that here. I want to go home.” It will be easier to break things off with him over the phone.
Demitri’s eyes bore into mine, and then he finally nods. “On one condition.”
“What?” I whisper.
“Nikhil guards you.”
Knowing I might be attacked because I inherited everything from my father, and his enemies might come after me, I nod. “Okay.”
Demitri gives me a pleading look. “I’ll give you the time you need, but I’m not giving up on us.”
“It’s only been six weeks,” I say, my voice straining from the tears I’m fighting to hold back.
He shakes his head lightly, his eyes filled with emotion. “It doesn’t change the fact that I love you.”
Oh, God.
My heart.
I just want to run into his arms and tell him I love him too. Instead, I stand rooted to the spot and fist my hands at my sides.
Be strong, Ariana.
For Demitri.
You can fall apart once you’re back in Seattle.
My voice is hoarse when I say, “You’re an incredible man, Demitri. I’ll always be thankful for everything you did for me.”
He nods, and then I walk to get my luggage, and standing with my back to him, I say, “I’d like to go home now.”
It’s getting impossibly hard to keep up this act.
DEMITRI
The pain I suffered from the gunshot wounds is nothing compared to what I’m feeling as I drive Ariana to the private airfield where the jet is being readied to take her back to Seattle.
Give her the time she needs. She’s been through a fuck-ton of shit and just needs to process it all.
All I want to do is take her back to the house and lock her in my fucking bedroom. But I can’t do that. I can’t force Ariana to stay.
I’m not sure what Ariana feels for me, I can only hope it’s strong enough to make her realize we belong together.
The ache in my chest grows as the silence between us stretches, and by the time I pull the SUV up to the private jet, it’s hard to breathe.
I throw the door open, and getting out, I walk around the front of the vehicle and open the passenger door. Ariana doesn’t look at me as she gets out, and it guts me further.