“I’m pleased my abilities meet with your approval, Princess Ka’rissa,” he murmured, continuing to use his vibrating hand to massage her neck and shoulders. “And that you trust me enough to let me help ease your pain.”
“You are…most kind,” Rissa murmured. “Indeed, I am feeling so much better now—I believe my headache is quite gone.”
“I’m glad,” James murmured.
He probably would have kept massaging her, but as pleasurable as it was, Rissa had to acknowledge that they couldn’t go on like this forever. For one thing, she was dying to get out of her tight corset and the heavy brocade dress. And for another, Lady Mildew would be in soon to remove her Chastity Wire, so that she might take an ice bath before going to bed that night.
If her old chaperone walked in while James was stroking her shoulders and Rissa was moaning with pleasure, she would certainly get the wrong idea and accuse them of impropriety.
“I’m afraid I must get undressed now,” she said. “Lady Mildew will be here soon and she’ll probably be quite angry if she has to wait for me in order to remove my Chastity Wire so that I may bathe.”
James raised an eyebrow at her.
“Even angrier than she was before? I do not understand the reason for such an illogical reaction to my presence.”
“She’s just a bitter old woman and she resents losing even a bit of her power over me,” Rissa said. She sighed. “You’d think she would be glad to get rid of me. She’s been my Constant Companion and chaperone ever since my dear Mama died and she’s done nothing but complain about what a trouble I am the entire time.” She tried to keep the bitterness out of her voice, but couldn’t quite manage it. “She’s never showed me even a bit of love or tenderness—not even right after my dear Mama…”
She trailed off, shaking her head, unable to let herself go back to that dark time in her childhood. She had cried every night for weeks, missing her mother so badly it felt like her entire body was being turned inside-out with grief. And Lady Mildew’s only response had been to send her to bed early in a dark room without her supper as punishment for her “hysterics.”
No, there was certainly no love lost between herself and her old chaperone, Rissa reflected. Lady Mildew cared for nothing except the outer appearance of propriety and how Rissa’s actions might reflect on her to the Court. Nothing else seemed to matter to her.
“Are you…feeling sad?” James asked hesitantly, pulling her back to the present.
“Sad? Over Lady Mildew? Why would you ask me that?” Rissa tried to laugh, but the sound came out rather choked.
“I ask because of these.” James knelt beside her. Cupping her cheek in his big hand, he swiped away a tear that had somehow leaked out. “Tears. Generally, when feelers cry, they are experiencing the emotion of sorrow or sadness,” he said and his deep voice was surprisingly soft and gentle.
“’Feelers’?” Rissa sniffed. “What do you mean by that?”
“Forgive me.” The big Kindred withdrew his hand, though he remained beside her chair, searching her eyes with his own. “That is the term we Dark Kindred use for humanoids who experience emotions, as we do not.”
“Oh, I see.” Rissa dropped her eyes, not sure what to say to his question. It reminded her all over that he was just a robot and that she shouldn’t try to assign human feelings or thoughts to him. “I must seem quite a curiosity to you, sitting here, leaking like a watering pot,” she said at last. “I beg your pardon, it is unseemly of me to cry in front of you.”
“Why?” He sounded genuinely confused. “While I do not have any emotions myself, it doesn’t bother me to see others express them. In fact, if your emotions are distressing you, please tell me if I can help you to ‘feel better’ in any way.”
Rissa sniffed again.
“You care about my feelings and want to help me feel better, even though you don’t have any emotions yourself? Why?”
He shrugged.
“I am here to protect you and keep you safe and well. Emotional wellbeing would seem to fall under the general parameters of my mission.”
Rissa gave a watery little laugh.
“You’re so singular, James! Sometimes you seem quite human and then other times you speak just like a robot. I don’t know how to make you out.”
It was probably a very rude thing to say to the big Kindred, but as he had no emotions, he wouldn’t be offended if she was honest, Rissa thought. And indeed, he only looked thoughtful as he considered her words.
“I am trying to understand emotions more,” he admitted. “I have gotten better at reading visual cues, but it would be much easier if you would tell me how you’re feeling. And, if you’re having negative emotions, tell me how to help.”