He raised his eyebrows. ‘Please. Elaborate.’
‘Well, obviously I can’t stop you from just dropping in at mealtimes—’
‘That’s very generous of you,’ he commented sardonically.
‘But in future, I’d prefer if you didn’t just take Cameron riding like you did on our first morning here, without having run it by me first.’
‘Your objection being what exactly?’
‘You should have woken me.’
‘Should I? You’d had a long and emotional journey the previous day and had shown no sign of stirring. But Cameron wanted to make sure you were okay before we went off together, and so he looked in on you and told me you were still sleeping. On balance, I decided it was best not to disturb you.’
‘Or maybe you just wanted to stake your claim on Cameron? To get him on his own so you could start influencing him.’
‘Influencing him to do what exactly, Caitlin?’
She shrugged, biting her lip as if trying to hold back an unwanted tremble. ‘Who knows? To turn him against me, perhaps. To push me out of the picture.’
He frowned. ‘You really think I would do something like that?’
‘How should I know what you’d do, Kadir? You put us on a plane and flew us halfway across the world—I wouldn’t put anything past you! It was his first morning in a strange place. And in a palace, no less. He’s never been anywhere like this before and it could have been very confusing for him.’
‘But he seemed perfectly fine with it. And Morag agreed with my suggestion.’
‘Of course she did. She would pretty much agree with anything you said because you’ve got her wrapped around your little finger!’
‘The same certainly cannot be said of you,’ he observed wryly. ‘So tell me, Caitlin—what’s really troubling you?’
She gave a frustrated wiggle of her hands. ‘Surely you must realise that if you start promising him things—it’s only going to create problems. Don’t you think this kind of treatment is unbearably seductive for a small boy? Promises of ponies and palace pools. So that when he goes back to his other life—his normal life, on a tiny island in the middle of the Minch—it will be unbearably difficult for him to settle back in.’
Kadir met the fierce accusation of her gaze and an unexpected feeling of sadness washed over him as he listened to her heated accusations. Couldn’t she see that everything was going to be different from now on? Was she really that naïve? ‘But this is your new normal, Caitlin,’ he said gently. ‘Better get used to it.’
Some of the indignation left her eyes and was replaced by a flicker of apprehension. ‘What are you talking about?’
He picked his words carefully. ‘People already know you are here—that much was inevitable. My aides tell me that much comment has been made of Cameron’s resemblance to me and that was inevitable, too. His identity cannot be kept a secret much longer. Sooner or later, the world is going to find out that he is my son and heir.’
‘And doesn’t he get any say in the matter?’ she demanded. ‘Don’t I?’
He shook his head. ‘This is not a question of who says what. He is my son. His destiny is written in the stars. Do you really think Cameron can just go back to his previous life and pretend nothing has changed? That he can carry on living on Cronarty?’
‘But the island is as safe as houses,’ she defended. ‘The people there are very loyal. They won’t make any kind of fuss, if I ask them not to.’
‘Oh, Caitlin.’ He shook his head. ‘Now you really are being naïve. We aren’t talking about an ordinary child. We are talking about the welfare of a future king and there are security issues at stake here. Big ones. My country is now at peace, but for many years we have been fighting a perilous war—and wars always create enemies. Don’t you think Cameron will be vulnerable to threats from outside sources once his identity is known? Isn’t that something you ought to consider before you take him back to a place where he will be largely defenceless against malevolent forces?’
He could see her lips folding in on themselves, as if she was trying very hard not to cry and that was not his intention. He didn’t want to make her cry—and not just because he wasn’t sure he was equipped to cope with a woman’s tears. ‘Caitlin—’ He held out a hand towards her but she shook it away.
‘I never meant for this to happen—to give birth to a future king!’ she burst out. ‘But you didn’t give me the choice, did you, Kadir? You didn’t tell me about all this royal stuff, because if you had, I could have turned around and run in the opposite direction!’
He stared at her, and as he saw the pain in her eyes something dark and unknown nagged away at... He furrowed his brow. Not his conscience, no. Something else. Something buried away deep inside him, but an instinctive measure of self-protectiveness made him quickly push the thought away. ‘Yes, I should have told you,’ he agreed huskily. ‘But I couldn’t. It wasn’t even a deliberate decision—it just happened that way. And even if I had told you, do you really think you would have walked, Caitlin? Don’t you think I tried myself and couldn’t manage it?’
She shook her head so that fiery strands of hair flew around her narrow shoulders. ‘That’s...irrelevant.’
‘No, it’s not. Not then and certainly not now. It’s still there, this...thing between us, and it won’t seem to go away.’ He shook his head. ‘Don’t you think it’s time we stopped fighting it, Caitlin?’
She stared at him. ‘You’re talking about...desire?’
‘Of course I am. What else could it be?’ he husked. ‘You must know how much I want you. And you want me, too. I can see it in your eyes and in your body. Why else do you shiver whenever I come near? And don’t you think I shiver, too? Well, don’t you?’