Rohan’s mouth latched onto that spot, teeth biting the sensitive skin. Jamil moaned, shivering. Rohan sucked for a long, blissful moment before suddenly wrenching himself away.
They stared at each other, breathing hard, Rohan’s eyes glazed and so very dark. “I’m not into men,” Rohan said tersely, something like angry bewilderment flickering across his face.
Jamil glared at him, offended by what he was implying. I assure you I’m not interested in you, either. “And yet, I’m not the one who just gave me a hickey.”
Rohan’s lips thinned. “It was an impulse I couldn’t control. You should leave.”
Jamil lifted his chin. “I will—when you stop crushing my hand and release me.”
Rohan shot their joined hands a sour, frustrated look. Slowly, very slowly, his tanned hand released Jamil’s. The moment it did, Jamil bit back an unhappy whine. He felt the loss so acutely that it bordered on painful.
Rohan grimaced. He took a deep breath, his eyes closing for a moment, his jaw clenched. When he opened his eyes again, there was a semblance of control in them. “All right. Ignoring the issue is clearly not working.”
Jamil almost laughed. That was quite an understatement. “What do you propose?” he said, crossing his arms over his chest to hide the shaking of his fingers.
Rohan smiled humorlessly. “You aren’t going to like it, Highness.”
“Let me be the judge of that.”
“I propose we just do it and get it over with.”
Jamil’s heart started beating so fast it made him a little dizzy. “It?” he managed, unable to believe Rohan was really suggesting what he thought he was suggesting.
Black eyes met his. “A merge. We clearly won’t be able to get anything done until we get this out of our systems.”
Jamil’s stomach squirmed. What Rohan was proposing was outrageous—not to mention illegal. A telepathic merge was the deepest form of mental contact between two individuals, outlawed on all planets of the Union because of how deeply invasive and dangerous it was. It was also incredibly intimate, usually practiced only by couples who trusted each other implicitly.
The mere suggestion of allowing a near stranger—a rebel—deep into his mind should have horrified and infuriated him. It should have. It wasn’t supposed to make him eager. It wasn’t supposed to make him feel as though he was a starved man offered a feast.
“Are you insane?” he managed, putting on his best offended face.
A muscle worked in Rohan’s lean jaw. “Look, Your Highness. We clearly can’t continue like this. I don’t know about you, but I’m sick and tired of feeling like I have no higher brain function the moment you walk into the room. We have stuff to discuss. Actual, important stuff I’m here for. I can’t keep getting sidetracked by this… stupid, inconvenient urge to fuck your brains out—literally.”
Jamil was pretty sure he’d never blushed so much in his life until he’d met Rohan di’Lehr.
“I agree that this issue is highly inconvenient,” Jamil said, with as much dignity as he could muster. “But what you’re suggesting is… unthinkable. Perhaps it’s different on Tai’Lehr, but here on Calluvia, telepathic merges are considered more intimate than… sexual intercourse.”
Rohan’s mouth twitched. “I think it’s the first time I’ve heard someone say ‘sexual intercourse.’” When Jamil glared at him, he dropped his smile, amusement fading from his eyes. “The opinion on telepathic merges isn’t all that different on Tai’Lehr. People generally do it only with people they trust—the risk of damaging your partner is actually greater, because we’re stronger telepaths than you Calluvians.”
“Then why are you suggesting this?”
“You know why,” Rohan said quietly, meeting Jamil’s gaze and holding it, the air between them thickening with the now-familiar longing for closeness.
Jamil’s stomach clenched.
“This is too damn strong for us to ignore,” Rohan said, taking a step closer. “I don’t know about you, but I’m really not fine with giving you hickeys, Your Highness.”
“I’m certainly not fine with it, either,” Jamil said, his face warm. “But I loved my husband very much and the thought of that kind of intimacy with another man is revolting to me.”
“Your husband is dead,” Rohan said flatly. “He doesn’t care.”
Jamil glowered at him.
Rohan seemed unmoved. “It’s only going to get worse, Your Highness.” His lips twisted as he dropped his gaze to Jamil’s neck. “It’s pretty damn bad already if I’m giving you hickeys. I’m not attracted to men. This is messing with our heads.”
Jamil moistened his lips with his tongue. “And you really think a merge would help?”
Rohan nodded. “It should. In the past, when I had a pretty good Fit with someone, the pull became easier to ignore after a merge.” Something flickered in his dark eyes. He grimaced. “Granted, it has never been this bad, but it should still work.”
Jamil hesitated. He couldn’t deny that it was tempting to finally get rid of this terrible, inappropriate yearning under his skin. But…