If Roman were a better man, he would assure Luke there was nothing wrong with him and that he had plenty of time to meet a good man who would deserve him.
But, as far as he was concerned, there wasn’t a man good enough to lick this precious boy’s boots. The world was full of selfish assholes like him. At least Roman was an asshole who could protect him and take care of him.
“You asked me if I was leaving,” Roman said, burying his fingers in Luke’s curls. He could never resist them. “Do you want me to stick around?”
Luke lifted his head and looked at him with a frown. “Does it matter what I want?” There was confusion and incredulity in his tone, and Roman got the sudden urge to kill every single man who was to blame.
“You’re asking the wrong question,” Roman said, his voice clipped and rough as he peered into Luke’s eyes. “You should be asking yourself whether you want it or not. You and I both know I’m not a nice man. A man like me has no business with someone like you. If you’re smart, you’ll tell me to get out of your life, Curly.” Chuckling, he brushed Luke’s temple with his thumb. “Do it now while you still can. Because once you’re mine, you’re mine.” He inhaled and exhaled slowly. “I already think of you as mine, but I think—I think I can still stop and leave you alone.” Maybe. “But if you choose to be mine, that’s it. Even if your perfect nice man ever turns up, you won’t stop being mine.” I’ll fucking kill him, and it’s not an exaggeration. “So think carefully. It’s your call, not mine.”
Luke’s eyes were wide, full of bewilderment, disbelief, and something very bright and warm.
At last, a slow smile stretched his lips. “I would say I want to be yours,” he said. “But I’m already yours.”
Roman didn’t know whether to laugh or curse.
“You’re an idiot,” he said again, cradling the boy’s heart-shaped face in his hands.
“Maybe, but I don’t care,” Luke said, turning his face to kiss Roman’s palm. “I want to be happy. You make me happy.”
Fuck dinner. Dinner could wait.
“I will.” Roman pressed his lips against Luke’s, stood up, and carried him toward the bedroom.
He had a boy to make happy.
Chapter 29
“You look different,” James said, looking at him from across the table.
Luke shrugged and dug into his salad, refusing to be self-conscious about his pink floral button down or his white skinny jeans. If anyone thought he looked flamboyant, it wasn’t Luke’s problem. He was done feeling embarrassed about who he was. He felt good in these clothes. That was the important thing.
“Mate…” James said cautiously. “Is that man forcing you to dress like that?”
Luke blinked. “What?”
Realizing James was actually serious, he started giggling. He knew James hadn’t exactly been thrilled when Luke had told him that he was seeing Roman, but Luke hadn’t realized the extent of it. It was the first time they were hanging out in nearly a month.
“Hey, it’s not funny,” James said. “I’m worried, you git. First you start shagging the guy who had you kidnapped for months, now you’re changing yourself for him.”
“I’m not changing myself for him,” Luke said with a crooked smile. “This is who I am. This is who I’ve always been. The only thing he changed was…he helped me see there was nothing wrong with me. I no longer feel like I have to hide it.”
James’s pale brows drew together, his blue-green eyes filled with confusion. “But why didn’t you say anything before? Did you think I would judge you?”
Luke met his gaze. “I distinctly remember you telling me how much you disliked Fred’s flamboyance and femininity.”
James flushed. “I disliked Fred because he wasn’t Ryan, not because...I kept comparing him to Ryan, so everything about him annoyed me—”
“I can’t blame you for being attracted to hunks,” Luke said, chuckling. “That would be very hypocritical of me.”
They shared an amused look before James turned serious. “I really don’t care, you know that, right? I’m sorry if I gave you that impression.” He smirked a little. “You can wear a skirt and I will still love you, Lucy.”
Rolling his eyes, Luke kicked him under the table. “I’m not into cross-dressing. I just like pretty things, and I’ve decided I’m not going to care if some narrow-minded people think it’s strange or effeminate. Gender stereotypes are stupid, anyway. I’m happy the way I am.”
“You do look happy.”
Luke smiled, thinking of the past few months. “Because I am happy.”
James eyed him thoughtfully. “You’re serious about him, aren’t you?”
Luke met his friend’s eyes. “I’ve never been more serious.”
“It’s just kind of crazy,” James said, sighing. “You realize that, right? He’s a man who kidnapped you and forced himself onto you.”