Jared looked up, as though asking for patience, and exhaled. “I know your body better than my own. I don’t need to ogle you to imagine doing all kinds of filthy things to you. And looking at you too much isn’t good for my self-control. Happy now? Did I stroke your ego enough? What is this all about, Gabe?” He sounded a little pissed off now.
Gabriel smiled, lifted himself up and pressed his lips to Jared’s.
Jared stiffened under him. It didn’t surprise Gabriel. Every time he did this, Jared tried to stop him, saying that he didn’t want anything given out of pity, blah blah blah, but Jared could never push him away.
Same thing happened this time, too. Jared’s body was rigid for a few seconds before he grabbed Gabriel’s face and thrust his tongue inside his mouth. The kiss was angry and hard and achingly hungry. Gabriel closed his eyes and tried to relax. Jared’s kisses weren’t as weird to him as they had been at the beginning, but they were still a little overwhelming and disorienting. Not in a bad way, just…they confused him. He loved feeling Jared’s firm lips on his and Jared’s tongue inside of him; he didn’t even mind the stubble that scratched his cheek. His body’s reaction was the confusing part. He’d always been extremely attuned to Jared, so the intensity of Jared’s need made him feel needy and vaguely unsatisfied too, uncomfortable and hovering on the brink of arousal. That confused the hell out of him, because he didn’t want Jared that way, but when Jared kissed him, his body almost wanted something. It was fucking confusing.
A small noise left his lips when Jared suddenly shoved him off and scrambled out from under him. He stood up, his hands clenched into fists.
Gabriel wiped his lips and eyed his stiff back warily. “Jay?”
“I told you to stop doing this,” Jared said, his voice clipped and rough. “You don’t have to do it to keep me around. It’s getting late. Good night.” And he stalked out of the room, tension visible in his shoulders. Tension and anger and something else. Gabriel suspected it had something to do with what Claire had told Jared, but no matter what he said, he couldn’t entirely convince Jared that Claire was wrong. And she was wrong.
Goddammit.
Gabriel thought for a while, not knowing what to do.
He stood up. Maybe he should apologize.
When he reached Jared’s room, he pushed the door open.
He stopped dead in his tracks.
Jared was lying in bed and he was…
Gabriel’s face turned hot. He wanted to leave, but for some reason, he couldn’t. He just couldn’t move. He stared, transfixed, at the thick, long cock wrapped in Jared’s large hand. Jared was stroking it hard.
He must have made some noise, because suddenly Jared stopped. Gabriel lifted his gaze from Jared’s erection to his face.
Jared was looking at him, his jaw tight with anger and frustration.
Their eyes met and Gabriel blushed even harder. Now it was definitely time to leave.
But he still didn’t move.
A twisted, slightly pained smile appeared on Jared’s face. “Close the door, Gabe. From the other side.”
Gabriel closed the door. Slowly, he walked away, a funny feeling in his stomach.
By the time he got into his bed, he still felt weird and thrown off-balance. He hugged his pillow and closed his eyes, but the restlessness did not subside. His hand slid down to cup his half-hard cock. He hesitated, but jerking off was as good idea as any to get rid of his restlessness.
It didn’t take long to become fully hard; it’d been weeks since he’d had sex. He stroked himself, imagining Claire’s curves and wet tightness. He wasn’t sure what it said about him that he missed sex more than he missed his girlfriend. An unbidden memory came to mind: of the club therapist, Dr. Bisset, hinting that Jared fulfilled all his emotional needs and that was the reason of his inability to fully commit to Claire.
Jared.
The image of Jared angrily pumping his cock flashed through his mind, and Gabe bit his pillow to muffle his moan as a confusing sort of thrill shot through his body. God, this was so messed up. How could he get off on the idea of Jared’s wanting him when he didn’t even swing that way? It made no sense. He didn’t want Jared and he couldn’t imagine having sex with a man, but…his cock ached as he remembered Jared’s erection squeezed in Jared’s fingers—because of him—for him. Jared wanted him. Jared wanted him more than anything, loved him more than anything, and loved and wanted…Jared’s arms, holding him, squeezing him hard…so good and safe…Jared’s voice, whispering sweet nothings to him…a strong, large hand stroking Gabe’s cock—
The orgasm hit him so suddenly and powerfully it was almost painful. Gabe groaned into the pillow, shaking and gasping.