“When I’m sad, Shawn hugs me and I don’t feel so sad anymore. You want a hug?”
Shawn expected Rutledge to reject the offer with a sneer.
He didn’t. He said nothing.
Taking his silence as a yes, Bee stood up and put her short arms around Rutledge’s neck. Rutledge had to steady her.
Shawn stared at Rutledge’s big hands on his little sister’s back and then at his blank, stoic face.
Quietly, he closed the door and padded back to the bed.
About twenty minutes passed before he heard the door open again. There was a rustle of clothing before the mattress dipped under Rutledge’s weight and he slid under the covers next to Shawn.
The speed with which Shawn latched onto him would have been embarrassing if Shawn could bring himself to care; he didn’t. He just needed to kiss him. Needed to touch him. So he kissed him and Rutledge kissed him back just as hungrily, his lips urgent, almost desperate.
Shawn wasn’t sure how many minutes they spent kissing—it felt like hours and seconds at the same time.
When they finally stopped kissing to breathe, Shawn was warm from head to toe. Hooking his leg over Rutledge’s hip, he put his head on his chest. Rutledge’s heart beat under his ear, strong and fast.
For a long while, there was only companionable silence.
“He died, didn’t he?” Shawn whispered at last.
He felt Rutledge go rigid under him. “Yes.”
Shawn hesitated, unsure what to say. “What happened? Someone said you were getting married.”
Rutledge sighed, something Shawn felt more than heard as Rutledge’s chest expanded under his cheek. “It was Joseph’s manipulations again. I went there because he told me he was on his deathbed. When I arrived, there was a huge gathering.”
“What kind of gathering?” Shawn said, running his fingers through Derek’s chest hair.
“Lots of politicians, rich businessmen and journalists. When I arrived, Joseph made an announcement.”
Shawn’s eyes widened. “He actually announced your engagement without asking you? It’s crazy.” Wow. He knew Derek’s father was a despot, but that was ridiculous, even for him.
Rutledge seemed to hesitate. “I think… I think he hasn’t been right in the head lately. And he probably hoped I wouldn’t want to make a scene in front of so many influential people and journalists. He was right—our family would have become a laughing stock if I did that. I took him aside and told him if he didn’t deny his announcement, I would do it myself.” Rutledge paused. His voice was flat when he continued, “He got furious and had a heart attack. He was dead by the next morning.”
Shawn closed his eyes. “Did you sort things out before he died?”
Rutledge chuckled, the sound harsh and humorless. “No. Even on his deathbed, he called me the biggest disappointment of his life. He tried to manipulate me even as he was struggling to breathe. Threatened to leave everything to Vivian’s husband if I didn’t marry that girl. Of course he didn’t. He’s—he was too old-fashioned for that.”
Shawn’s lips brushed the warm skin, and he breathed in, feeling the steady beat of Rutledge’s heart against his cheek. “I’m glad you’re back, Derek.”
He felt Rutledge’s body stiffen for a moment and then relax against his.
A strong arm wrapped around Shawn’s back and pulled him close tightly, almost bruising his ribs.
Shawn didn’t complain. He snuggled closer to Derek’s warmth and fell asleep momentarily.
He slept like a baby, for the first time in a week.
Chapter 23
“Derek,” Shawn said, closing the door.
Derek didn’t look up from his computer. “Not now. I’m busy and you’re… you’re too distracting.”
Shawn smiled. “Distracting, huh?”
Derek shot him a glare, but it was half-hearted at best.
“Come on, just tell me already!”
“No special treatment,” Derek said. “You’ll learn your grade when everyone else does. Tomorrow.”
Leaning back against the door, Shawn bit his lip. “Did I fail?”
He wasn’t sure. Derek had helped him a lot lately, explaining a lot of the stuff Shawn had missed at the beginning of the semester. Shawn had thought his understanding of the subject improved and that he’d done pretty well on the exam, but now, looking at Derek’s grim face, he wasn’t sure anymore.
“No,” Derek said. “You didn’t fail.”
Shawn breathed out. “So what did I get? A C, right?”
Derek pursed his lips. “You got a B.”
Shawn’s mouth fell open. “Really? Wait, did you—”
“No, I didn’t give you any special treatment,” Derek said, his tone somewhat defensive. “You did a good job. You’re not unintelligent. If you actually bothered to attend classes, you wouldn’t have had any problems at all.”
Shawn grinned, feeling stupidly warm and giddy. He took a step toward the desk, but Derek snapped, “Don’t.”
“Why?”
Derek fixed his eyes on the screen in front of him, his jaw clenched. “I told you. You’re distracting. I have to work.”
Shawn didn’t want to go. He wanted to hug him. He wanted to kiss him. He wanted to celebrate with him. “But…”