“Yeah.” And I guess I’m not either. I haven’t done anything in weeks.
They helped me forget about all the bad memories of my father. My mother. How he would remind us that we live for God. I still have the scars to go along with them. So, even if I was lucky enough to forget, the reminder will forever be there. Just like he wanted. In a way, the bastard won. Even after all these years, he’s still in my head.
“Please, Mom. Make him stop,” I beg her as I lie on my stomach.
She sits next to me on my bed, rubbing cream on my burn marks as tears slowly run down the side of my cheeks to wet my pillow.
“Forgiveness must be earned,” she says softly.
“Forgiveness from what?” I ask. I haven’t done anything wrong. Not yet anyway.
“Being born,” she answers.
She makes it sound like I asked for this life. Who would want to live a life of punishment? “I didn’t …”
“Shh,” she tells me. “It won’t be like this forever, son. But power comes with a price. He’s preparing you for what’s to come.”
“I don’t want it.” I’m not even sure what she’s talking about, but I know it’s not what I want.
“A King is powerful. He rules his Kingdom. He must be able to endure the darkest of days. He must be able to conquer the biggest threat. You are too young to understand now, but one day you will see. You will find strength in the crosses that you bear.”
“Cross?”
I blink and look up to see her now standing next to my barstool.
“You okay?” She reaches out to cup my face, but I’m faster. My arm lashes out, gripping her wrists and stopping her. She sucks in a breath at the tightness of my grip. Instead of releasing her, I yank her closer to me.
She practically falls into my lap. I stand quickly and grip her hips. Picking her up, I plant her ass on the bar and move to stand between her legs. I need her right now. I want a fucking hit. I hate that I can’t get high to erase the memories, and she’s the closest thing I have to a drug.
She doesn’t hesitate. Alexa lets me take control. I kiss her desperately. My lips bruising hers. My fingers dig into her soft yet firm skin. A growl comes from deep in my chest. The need to control is strong.
I never had control before of any aspect of my life. I was conditioned to like fire, to learn from it, and that’s what she is—my fire. She burns me in a way that leaves scars. The kind that I won’t be ashamed of and hide with tattoos.
She pulls away, throwing her head back, sucking in a breath. I kiss my way down her neck as I shove her shirt up and over her head before tossing it to the floor.
Her hands run through my hair before gripping it.
“God, I’ve missed you.” I let go of her long enough to undo her jeans.
“Me too,” She breathes, lifting her hips so I can yank them down her legs. They meet her shirt on the floor as well. “I’ve missed you.”
I jerk her from the bar and carry her over to the closest round table. I bend her over it, facedown. Her hands flatten out over the surface, and I pull my hard dick out before running my fingers over her pussy. She’s wet, which is good because I’m in the mood to fuck.
Sliding into her, I feel everything fade away. She’s my fire. They say love should be your shelter from the storm, but that’s not even close to what I feel for Alexa. She’s everything I was taught to need. Crave.
She’s my altar, where I kneel and repent for all the sins I’ve committed over the years. The souls I’ve taken.
Her pussy tightens around me as I fuck her, and I look down to watch my hard cock slide in and out of that sweet fucking cunt I can’t get enough of. My hands grip her hips, holding her in place while her body rocks back and forth on the table, making it rattle with each thrust.
Her hands reach out above her head, and she grips the edge of the table, needing something to hang onto. “Oh God, Cross …” she cries out as I slam into her.
Letting go of her hips, I lean over her back, and my right hand grips her hair. Yanking the side of her face off the table, I kiss her. Needing to taste her lips while I’m inside her. Needing more of her than she could ever offer.
A sinner is a man who takes what he wants without question. I want her. Right now. Tomorrow and the next day. I need her like I need a hit that I haven’t had in weeks. Like the cigarettes that I gave up because I didn’t need another death trap in my life. I’ve already got enough enemies for that. Why try my luck?