It was difficult to get out what I wanted to say, worried she would be angry or worse, hurt. “Theo hired a private investigator to find out about my dad. That envelope has all his information.”
My mom was silent, staring at the envelope as if it were alive but dormant, and at any moment, it would jump to life. She was barely audible when she said, “I’m sorry I never told you about him.” A teardrop spattered the kitchen table.
“No, Mom! No. That’s not what this is about. I understand.” My chest ached not wanting to hurt my mother’s feelings.
She just nodded quietly in a trance, looking at the envelope. I wondered what memories of my dad flooded back to her as she stared.
Drumming my hands on the manila envelope with my name written on it in bold black letters, I said, “I didn’t want to open it without talking to you first. I don’t want to hurt you or make you think that you weren’t enough for me, because you were.” Now my own tears choked me up.
Mom wiped the tears off my cheeks with both her thumbs looking into my eyes. “You have the right to know.” Her eyes were full of sadness and regret. “Once your father left during my third month of pregnancy, I never heard from him again, but, I didn’t look.” She paused looking away into the past. “I never looked back because I had you, a baby on the way, and I had to get strong for that.”
My arms wrapped around my mother’s shoulders. “You are strong. The strongest woman I know.”
“If you want to know about your father, even meet him, I’m okay with that.” My mom squeezed me tightly. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Mia. I love you.”
The yearning to know my father dissipated as I held onto my mother. Whoever my dad was, he didn't have the same love for me that my mother did or else he would have come for me. He wouldn't have let all the years pass without ever once trying to contact me or get to know me.
As I took the envelope in my hands, my mother looked at me with understanding eyes. The shredder was in the adjoining room. I headed straight for it. I had made my decision. Mom was enough for me. “I don't need to know, Mom. He has had plenty of time to find me, and he hasn't.”
My mom followed close behind me. “Are you sure? You don't have to do that.”
I turned on the shredder without any doubt in my mind. “I want to.” Watching the envelope going through the slot and turn into shreds of paper, I felt renewed, proud of myself, even.
I put my arm around my mother. “All I need is you, Mom.”
We smiled at each other and walked back to the kitchen. It felt good to get that out of the way and off my chest.
The latest issue of Vogue was on the kitchen counter. Mom wiped the last of my tears with the back of her hand, kissing me on the forehead. Then she nodded at my breakfast, “Eat,” she said and began flipping through the issue. She stopped on a Marc Janow ad of me – the one where I was standing in front of Theo's painting.
She held it up to me as I ate my eggs. “You look so beautiful!”
Tucking my hair behind my ear, I smiled, “Thanks. I get it from my mom.”
My mother walked over to me with concern on her face and took my hand in hers. “I noticed you haven't been wearing your engagement ring. Is it getting resized? Or...”
It was time to tell the truth about everything. My mom listened while I talked. When I was done, she asked, “Could this Penny girl be lying?”
“The Board minutes confirmed it. Theo only proposed to me in order to improve his image for the company.” The minutes had solidified everything for me. Penny hadn't been lying.
“I'm sorry, Mia,” Mom said, brushing hair out of my eyes with her hand.
“I was so stupid to fall for a playboy. Penny has known Theo for years, but I've only known him for a few months. I should have known there was something more to their relationship.”
My mom shook her head sympathetically. “You couldn't have! You trusted him. That doesn't make you stupid.”
I felt stupid. Theo had never cared about me, only his company. When I uncovered those orgy photos, that should have been a sign to me that Theo Wainwright was a womanizing asshole.
But, no. I fell for it. I walked right into his trap. To think, I almost married him. To think, I could have been in a sham of a marriage. Even though Penny wasn't my favorite person in the world, I had her to thank from saving me from years and years of grief.
Chapter 23
Theo
I spent a few days relentlessly returning to Mia’s dorm and begging Jill on hands and knees to tell me where Mia was. I didn’t blame Jill for wanting me far away from Mia, but after I explained myself, she told me Mia was in Carpinteria at her mom’s.
I jumped on the next available flight in the morning to get down there as quickly as possible. It had already been a week since the incident. Who knew what was going through Mia’s head?
The more time that passed the harder it would be to get Mia back. There was no way I was going to come back to the Bay Area without her. My life would forever be incomplete without Mia by my side.