Seeing his name on my screen has done something to me, further ignited the same flame I usually feel in his presence, but intensified it. For some reason, I’m willing to risk my dignity for this man, because
I miss him. And I can’t remember ever caring about a man enough to miss him this much when he’s not around.
I take a deep breath and type out a message. Jessie doesn’t fight me this time.
Lucy: Hey, so, Drew left last week for his medical trip, and I was planning on taking Levi to the park in the morning to fly his kite. Drew usually goes with us, but since he’s not around, I was wondering if you’d want to come? I know it probably doesn’t sound very exciting, but if you’re free, we’d love to have some company. I mean…if you don’t have any hot dates to go on. If you do, no worries, I totally understand.
I try to swallow my heart back down from my throat while I wait for a response. I also decide that if Cooper says no to this, I’ll be done. I will find a way to force this crush out of my heart because it would be nothing but a waste of time to pursue a man who doesn’t want to fly a kite with me and Levi. My son and I are a package deal, and I will always choose Levi over a man.
Levi is the reason I picked up my pride and carried it back home with me to live with Drew after I failed to pave my own way in Georgia. He’s why I’ve sat through unbearable meals with Brent and every single one of his girlfriends over the years so I can get to know the women who will be a presence in my son’s life. He’s why my favorite jeans will never fit me again but I still refuse to throw them away.
So, if he doesn’t want me AND Levi, I’ll let any hopes I have of Cooper falling for someone like me go.
But…maybe I won’t have to.
Cooper: Pick you guys up at 9?
Okay, don’t panic, Lucy. Don’t panic.
DING DONG.
I’m panicking! I’m panicking so hard. Red-flashing-lights, alarms-sounding, someone-give-this-woman-a-sedative panicking!
Cooper is here to take Levi and me to the park, and not only do I suddenly not know how to walk normally anymore, but my mouth is all dried up and devoid of the moisture necessary to speak. I’ve never introduced my son to a boyfriend before—not that Cooper is a boyfriend, or anything even resembling one. But I think we can comfortably state that he’s a crush…a crush like I haven’t had since high school when I cut out too many pictures of Orlando Bloom and pasted them to my wall. Yeah, that’s right, glued—not taped. I was serious.
I haven’t resorted to that level of crushing with Cooper yet, but mostly because he doesn’t have a social media account, so there’s nowhere to download and print photos of his gorgeous face. Ha ha, kidding. I’d never do that.
Never…
“He’s here!” Levi shouts, acting as an unnecessary second doorbell.
“Oh, great!” Does my voice sound high-pitched to you? “Go get your shoes on, and I’ll answer the door.”
“K!” Levi runs off, a blur of blond hair as he dashes to the mudroom for his shoes.
I take that opportunity to full-on madwoman-sprint to the door and fling it open. I spring out at Cooper like a crazy jack-in-the-box, and he responds appropriately. His shoulders jump, and he takes a quick step back before realizing I’m not a psycho murderer and relaxing his shoulders.
I shut the door behind me and lean back against it with my hands on the doorknob. Cooper takes one deep breath and shakes his head, smiling. “Geez, woman. I thought I was about to have a heart attack at thirty-two.”
My brows pull together. “Have you had your blood pressure checked lately?”
He’s wearing a baseball hat, but since I’m so short, I can still see his eyes—his confused eyes. “Huh?”
“Just saying…it’s not uncommon for men to have heart attacks at thirty. You should have your—” And then I realize I’m being a weirdo again and give myself a mental slap. “Never mind. I just wanted to get to you before Levi so you can know a few things.”
He crosses his toned arms and assumes a serious expression. “Okay, shoot.”
“He’s never been introduced to any of my male friends before, so be prepared for any uncomfortable question under the sun, and just know that I have zero control over what comes out of his mouth.”
“Like, what are we talking? Is Santa Claus real, or where do babies come from?”
“Probably some combination of both. Defer to me on both accounts.”
“Got it. Go on.”
I grip the handle harder, using it as an anchor so I don’t go wrapping my arms around his tempting shoulders. This casual cotton tee is really working for him. Let’s be real, though—everything works for him. “He’s a four-year-old. He’s going to get super upset with the kite sometimes, and he might throw a tantrum when it’s time to leave. When we’re in the car, he likes to listen to ‘Wheels on the Bus’ on repeat. And he almost always—”
“Lucy…” Cooper says, cutting me off with a heart-melting smile. He steps forward, and I watch his hands rise up to rest on my hips. I’m a human circuit board now. Electrical currents zing through me, and I’m pretty sure if his index finger touched the tip of my nose, my entire body would light up like a rainbow strobe light.