From the light of the candles, he could see that Rose’s skin looked almost blue, and crystals covered her eyelashes. He had only been out the weather for half of an hour, and he was cold to his bones. Rose had been out much longer and was literally freezing to death because of it.
“Carver, take her to her room!” called out his mother, her own eyes wide from the shock of seeing Rose so motionless and pale. There was only one other time in his entire life he had seen such worry in his mother’s eyes. This night was beginning to feel far too familiar.
He didn’t hesitate, but flew up the stairs taking as many at a time as he could manage until he was outside of Rose’s door. He suddenly remembered telling the maid to light the fire in her room. But wasn’t there some kind of rule about warming a person slowly after they were freezing? He felt even more helpless. She needed a doctor, someone who knew what they were doing. Not him. He had no choice but to follow his instincts. He instructed a maid to open a window in her room before he carried her inside.
He crossed the room and gently laid her on the bed. He felt her pulse and noted that it was even slower than before. Her eyes were still closed and her wet hair clung to her face and arms.
Carver’s fingers started fumbling over the buttons of Rose’s cloak with the intent to remove the wet clothes from her fading body as fast as possible.
“Carver, go out!” said his mother as she ran into the room.
He didn’t stop. Hands shaking he continued to release any button or fastener that he could find.
Mary, now at his side, caught his hands. His eyes shot to hers, ready to push his sister aside. But the softness in her voice stopped him. “You cannot be the one to do this, Carver. Let us help you.” That brought him to his senses. He was not her husband. No matter how pure his intentions, he could not be the one to remove Rose’s clothes. Not when his mother and sister were there to do it for him. He had to let them help. “Go change and collect yourself. We will tend to Rose and call you once you can return,” said Mary.
Carver did not want to leave Rose’s side for anything in the world, but Mary was right. He would be no help in his current state. With a clenched jaw and sodden hair, he nodded his agreement and left the room. Left the woman he loved there to die. Just like the last time.
Chapter 34
“You are going to wear a hole in the floor if you keep pacing like that,” said Robert. But Carver couldn’t bring himself to care, so he continued his back-and-forth track outside of Rose’s bedchamber.
“That blasted doctor has been in there a half hour,” said Carver. The physician had arrived while Carver was away, changing out of his wet clothes. He had never been so thankful to have a doctor who neighbored the estate in his entire life. But right now, he hated him for closeting himself in that room without giving anyone outside an update.
“That blasted doctor is saving Rose’s life,” said Robert.
Carver wanted to believe that was true more than anything. But he hadn’t seen or heard anything about Rose’s condition since he had left her cold, wet, and unconscious on her bed. He never should have left.
“I’m going in,” he said, losing his last bit of resolution and heading toward the door.
Robert stepped in front of the door, blocking his way. “No, you are not. She might be indecent.”
“Frankly, I could give a dash, Robert. Move out of my way.”
Robert didn’t budge. “Carver, try to think rationally,” he said, putting a firm hand on Carver’s shoulder. “When Rose is recovered, how do you think she will feel knowing that you got an eye full while she was unconscious?”
Biting back all of his rebuttals, Carver released a breath. “You’re right.” It wouldn’t be fair to her.
“I know I am,” said Robert with a smile that didn’t annoy Carver because it was more sympathetic than happy. “Why don’t you go eat something?” But it was difficult to eat when he felt like vomiting.
Carver moved to the adjacent wall of Rose’s room and sat down on the floor. He shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere until I hear if she’s alright.”
The minutes passed at a grueling pace. No one came or went out of Rose’s door. Was that a good sign? Or bad? Elizabeth and Oliver had come to see if there had been any changes with Rose, and to inform them that the last few guests had finally left the ball. The duke had announced to the crowd that there was no need to be alarmed, but that a family member had suddenly taken ill, and because of that, they would need to end the ball early. Most were staying the night at Dalton Park in the guest wing but the few who lived nearby had departed as soon as the weather had let up.
By that time, the whole family had been informed about exactly who Rose was. None of them seemed angry. None of them peppered him with questions. Everyone was just as sole
mn and worried about Rose’s health as he was. They had fallen in love with her as well.
Eventually, Elizabeth and Oliver left to see to the servants and help close up the ballroom. Felix took up their post in the hallway outside of Rose’s room. The man looked every bit as distraught as Carver felt. No one could seem to find any words to say. The silence was thick and heavy and oppressive and felt as if it could swallow him up. Even though he was silent, his thoughts were loud and frantic.
Would she wake up? Had frost bite set in? Would she lose her fingers or toes? Would she ever be able to forgive him for not being there when she needed him?
Just then the door to Rose’s room opened, and the doctor slipped out with Mary following closely behind. The doctor did not stop to talk to Carver, only gave a brief nod and then headed for the stairs. Carver watched the procession mutely. Did no one think he deserved to know whether the woman he loved was even alive?
He was just about to demand that the doctor stop and tell him exactly what he knew about Rose when Mary spoke up first. “He has another emergency to see to. I will fill you in,” she said in a soft voice. “But first—Robert, please go ask a servant to bring a tea tray. We want to have one ready for when Rose awakens.”
“She isn’t awake yet?” Carver asked as Robert stepped past him to go find a servant.
Why hadn’t she awoken? And at least a hundred other questions buzzed through his mind as he frantically searched for an answer hidden in his sister’s obnoxiously calm face.