It was awkward. I was twelve. I had just wanted to watch Harry Potter.
“The funny thing, that woman in the movies or on the sex toy boxes, it looked like my mother, but it wasn’t my mother.”
I glanced over. I wanted her to understand that until her dying breath, Ellie Levin was a sweet and classy woman. What she did on-screen had nothing to do with the way she loved my father, the way she raised me, the way she loved me. I could only hope Everly’s parents showed her as much love. I hoped her parents were just as proud.
“Why do you want to be a lawyer?”
My question prompted her to down the rest of her drink and pour herself another glass.
“Should I ask another question?” I half laughed. I knew there was something up, no one was that uptight about a future they wanted so badly.
“It’s just something I’ve always wanted to do.” She shrugged. “My parents are both lawyers. They’ve pushed me into the profession. Helped me plan. Consider my options.”
“But do you want to be a lawyer?”
She turned and frowned. I saw the indecision. The anxiety that bubbled up in her eyes every time she said she had to study or write a paper. And I saw it now. Like she wanted to scream.
I knew about parental pressure. My father had always wanted me to get into the family business. I never questioned it. It was easy. It was convenient and accessible. And so I did. I wanted to prove to my father that I had what it took. I wanted him to be proud.
She was thinking about her answer and her eyes glazed over. She had been here, with me, in the moment this whole time and the mere mention of law school and her future had her retreating.
“Hey…” I wiped away from her face the loose strands of hair that had fallen out of her ponytail. “Stay here with me. Don’t get all thinking on me now.”
She smiled and looked out into the darkness. In just a few minutes it would be light.
I nuzzled her ear and wrapped my arm around her body, pulling her closer.
“You know, I’m still waiting to see something amazing.”
I laughed. Patience was definitely not her virtue.
Chapter 8
Everly
There wasn’t anywhere else I’d rather be. But I couldn’t let him know that. I couldn’t tell him that even if his penis really did turn out to be the something amazing, I’d check that item off the list so damn fast, it would be like it wasn’t even on it.
“I think that you need to relax a little before we get into the amazing.”
He was more perceptive than I gave him credit for. He knew within seconds when I’d closed myself off.
Thinking about school and lawyer things made me tense and my future flashed before my eyes.
“Is that so.” I smiled. I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my face. “And how do you propose I relax?”
He pulled me closer, settling me into the side of his body—one arm wrapped around my shoulders, the other gently ran up and down my biceps.
“Close your eyes.” He looked out into the horizon. The sun was rising, its light sneaking up against the dark sky, orange and pink and breathtaking.
When Max looked at me, he saw I still hadn’t done as he’d asked.
“Close your eyes.” He nudged me with his shoulder.
I did, and let my head fall back against his arm.
“Think of something that makes you happy.”
There was only one thing that made me happy. My room. My sanctuary. The room I had decorated all by myself. I had a passion for decorating, and I hoped one day I would have the time to redo the rest of my grandma’s house. I definitely knew what didn’t make me happy. The thought of becoming a lawyer. That just filled me with anxiety.