He adjusted the big, puffy pillow before the boy could have rested his head, and covered him with a blanket, making sure all the ends were tucked in. “If you’re not warm enough, don’t be shy to let Judith know.”
Tommy nodded, but his intense gaze stayed on Cole, as if there was something he wanted to say. He had Butcher Tom’s eyes, so very attentive and bright, but despite the similar nose, and the hands with six fingers, he wasn’t much like his father at all. The Tom Cole had known would have despised a son so soft and fearful, but he hadn’t lived to meet his child, so it didn’t matter. None of Butcher Tom’s rules mattered anymore.
[Tell me about my mother?] Tommy asked and licked his lips, curling his hands under his round cheek.
A part of Cole wanted to say his goodbyes and spy on the situation between Ned and Terje, but this boy needed someone to talk to, and who else could do that if not the one man who understood his hand signs?
“She was very beautiful. And she made lovely embroidery. I got to know her when I was still pretty young, and that’s how I learned your language.”
[Did my father speak it too?] Tommy was so eager to soak up every word from Cole’s lips he hardly blinked, as if worried he might miss something.
Cole wasn’t sure how to answer at first. He hadn’t thought about it much before, but Tom hadn’t bothered to learn signs beyond the most basic ones, and instead relied on Lotta writing her thoughts down. But what was the point of mentioning it now? “Yes. Many of us learned it, because we wanted her to feel comfortable.”
[What was she like?]
Tommy hadn’t asked about his father on the way to Denver, so maybe he’d been afraid to do it in Ned’s presence, even though the two of them had become good friends during that time.
Ned was real good with the kid.
Perhaps he’d make a decent father, if he chose to marry after all.
Cole swallowed around the discomfort in his throat and smiled at Tommy, somewhat surprised by that question. If Lotta had only died a few months prior, then Tommy had spent most of his life at her side. Still, he indulged the boy. “Always elegant. Your father bought her the prettiest dresses, and she looked mighty fine with hair curled, and rosy cheeks. She owned a china set for tea and used it every afternoon, like clockwork. Even when we were traveling. It was a treat to be invited to it."
[Father liked tea? Zeb said he was fearless and deadly.]
Cole wanted to roll his eyes. Of course Zeb would have said that. Vengeful fucker. Some days Cole regretted they hadn’t ended him after all. At least they’d only meet again in Hell.
“Zeb only saw one side of your father. I’m not claiming everything he said was a lie, but you shouldn’t trust people. At the end of the day, everyone has an agenda.”
Or it was just his bitterness talking. Either way, it was a lesson Tommy should learn sooner rather than later.
The boy nodded, but his eyes were already closing. [Why did Ned kill him?]
Zeb might have told him a version of the story, but maybe Tommy was already taking Cole’s advice to heart and tried to get his information from more than one source? Smart boy.
Cole stilled, wondering what he should say to someone so young, younger even than he had been when his mother orphaned him, but eventually he squeezed Tommy’s small hand on top of the blanket and spoke, “Your father loved your mother and had been good to her, but you must have heard that he was an outlaw, and he hurt a lot of people. He took care of me when my parents died, and I loved him as if we were family, so I was angry at Ned too, but now I know that he did what he had to. He is not a bad person. I want you to remember that,” Cole whispered, suddenly thinking back to the way Ned had cradled him on the way to the doctor, when Cole had been in so much pain he wouldn’t have been able to ride himself. Memories of those hours were a blur, but Cole recalled scraps of Ned threatening the doctor’s family, of his whisper soothing Cole as he endured the traumatic surgery, and of him cooing like a mourning dove to remind Cole he was there at all times. Ned had broken all of his rules that day. All for Cole.
Back then, it would have been so easy for Ned to just leave him by the girl’s body and run to safety, yet he’d taken a risk to save Cole. He might have changed since, but deep down Cole trusted that Ned would still do the same thing, were Cole in danger.