But it was precisely the response I’d been hoping for. It meant that some part of him still wanted me and had no intention of sharing me with anyone. I held my breath, waiting. I could think of no other way to sway him, so I could only hope what I’d said was enough.
“All right,” he breathed, and I exhaled with him. “But not here. I’m taking you home, Scar.”
Home? I didn’t have a home anymore. Derek was my home. “I don’t…”
“My home.”
“I didn’t know you had a home,” I said stupidly. Of course, he had a home somewhere. He wasn’t a desert nomad.
“That’s because no one but me has ever been there.”
I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I didn’t want to consider what it meant that he wanted to take me to his home. I didn’t want to hope that maybe, even after I was healed, he would still want me. But it was difficult not to when he said things like that. He was taking me somewhere no other person—no other woman—had ever been. That had to mean something, didn’t it? But…
“Is it safe? I mean, don’t we need to stay hidden?”
“I’ve been in touch with various contacts since we got here. The story is you escaped when Marcos’ car was attacked, but recaptured by a rival group. I’ve been hunting you down and looking for signs that Marcos is still alive. As a loyal follower, I can’t accept that he’s dead, and I’m keeping you in tow to hand over to him when I find him.”
Oh. I’d had no idea he’d been busy setting up a story that would mean we no longer had to run and hide. I didn’t care in the least that it cast me as the naughty runaway slave. It was perfect because it meant no one would come after me since I was already in Derek’s possession. And most importantly, it means no one was coming after Derek. He was safe.
He was taking me to his home, and there he would help me heal. I allowed the ripple of hope that ran through me to have its moment. I didn’t even try to squelch it. I closed my eyes and focused on the feel of his strong hands as they smoothed miracle-cream down my back.
“Thank you,” I whispered as the tiredness I’d pushed back earlier closed in on me again.
“Save your thanks, Pet. You might not be feeling so appreciative soon,” he whispered back, his voice as raw as it had been that first day I’d woken up in the hotel room.
I was too tired to respond, so I brought his words down with me, trying to mull them over as I drifted off to sleep. Was he right? No, he couldn’t be, I decided as I lingered somewhere between awake and asleep.
My tormentor’s whip cracked in the air all around me, echoing off the stone walls as the nightmare pulled me in. Always helpless. Powerless. Awake or asleep, nothing was my choice.
But it would be soon.
2
Derek
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What the fuck had I agreed to?
I asked myself for the thousandth time since Scar had made her request. Three days had passed since then, and I felt no better about it now than I had then. She’d said it was what she needed, but could I do it? I’d told her I would do whatever it took for her to heal, but could I go through with this?
The most fucked up part of it was I knew the answer. As much as I hated myself for it, I knew. I would never stop hungering for it—for her. I craved her submission like an addict. Scar, offering herself up—it was the most potent drug on earth.
I crossed lanes and took the exit off the highway. Twenty-three minutes—less than half an hour, and I’ve had to make good on my agreement. Already I’d noticed a change in her. She’d still slept a lot the past three days, but when she was awake, it was as if more of her was awake than had been before. She was still content to lay in my arms as I rambled on about shit—most of which I’d never told another living soul—but she asked questions now and then, and even injected a few thoughts of her own.
When I’d found her in that basement, I’d feared that even if she healed physically, she would never fully come back from the dark place those fuckers had taken her. But I’d known she was strong, that she would find a way. I’d just never imagined this would be the way.
I glanced over at her sleeping form, her lips slightly parted and her features relaxed. Inside and out, she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever known. I would never stop craving her, but right now, after all, that had happened to her, what I was about to do was going to be the most difficult thing I’d ever done. Difficult, not only because of what they’d done to her but because part of me was going to enjoy it.