“Because it’s good policy, Skye, that’s why. What about you?”
“I’m good. Clean.”
“That’s not what I’m concerned about.”
“What’s the problem, then?”
“Pregnancy. I don’t want a kid. You carry a rubb
er around in your purse. Does that mean…?”
“Extra protection. I’m on the pill.”
I heave out a sigh of relief. Still naked, I sit down next to her. “Thank God.”
She lets out a nervous laugh. “The good news is we don’t have to use condoms anymore.”
“I always use condoms.”
“Why? If we’re both clean, and I— Oh.” She presses her lips together.
“Finish what you were going to say, Skye.”
She inhales and lets out a stream of breath slowly. “I’m not the only woman you’re sleeping with, am I?”
“This week you are.”
The words are true, but I know how they must sound to her. Though I desire Skye more than I have any other woman, I’m not ready to say that she’s the only one. I’m not sure there is a “one” for me. I have specific tastes, and I don’t expect a woman to put up with me forever. I’m not wired that way anyway.
But this…
I never forget the condom. I treat my sex life the way I treat my business life.
A sexually transmitted disease or an unwanted pregnancy would intrude on my lifestyle, so I minimize the chances of either of them occurring, just as I minimize the chances of any chink in my business armor as well.
Silence for a few more seconds. Then—
I turn to her. “That’s never happened to me before.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve never forgotten to put on a condom.”
I’m still naked. I should get dressed. But I’m finding it difficult to move. What does forgetting the condom imply?
Already I know the answer to my own question, even though I can’t let myself begin to contemplate it. To do so would entail admitting something I’m not ready to admit.
Except I don’t need an admission, because I already know.
It’s inside me, a part of me—something I can no longer deny.
Yes, I desire Skye more than I have any other woman. Yes, I find her a challenge. Yes, I want her to give up her control to me, to submit to me.
All that is true.
But there’s more. So much more that I didn’t plan on.
“Did you enjoy it?” Skye asks.