“I see.” Except treating the body like a temple apparently doesn’t negate ink and piercings. But hey, all God’s children…
“Anyway,” she says, “the whole thing with Addie and Braden started at one of our parties. The folks were out of town, and Add and I had just finished high school.”
He deserves the same respect he’s granting you, says the little angel on my shoulder.
She’s willing to spill everything, chants the devil on the other side. You want to know. You know you want to know. It’s been killing you.
“Anyway, that’s how it started. I’m not sure how, but Braden and Ben Black ended up at one of our parties.”
I hold up my hand. I can’t do this to Braden. “Stop. Please.”
“Why? You want to know, right? Of course you already know how incredible looking they both are, so they were a big hit.”
“A couple guys from South Boston?”
“Yeah, weird, right? But somehow they found out about our shindig, and they showed up. Addie and I were barely eighteen, and we were intent on slumming it a little that summer. Braden and Ben Black were the perfect candidates.”
“How did she and—”
He deserves the same respect he’s granting you, says the little angel on my shoulder.
She’s willing to spill everything, chants the devil. Everything.
I take another sip of bourbon. “ “I can’t listen to any more.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
“I wish I were, but I made a promise to myself that I’d let Braden tell me this stuff when he was ready.”
“He won’t be ready,” Apple says. “Ever.”
“How do you know that?”
She doesn’t reply. Just takes another sip of the soda water she hates. Then, “I’m trying to help you.”
“I know, and I appreciate it. I really do.”
“Tell you what.” She finishes her soda water. “I’ll take you home. You have my number. If you change your mind, I’m here.”
“Why do you care about telling me this stuff?”
“I already told you. The enemy of my enemy, sweetheart.”
“Addie and I aren’t enemies.”
“You may not think so. She does.”
“Why? I’ll never have her following.”
“Doesn’t matter. You have something else she wants. Something she’s always wanted and could never have.”
“Braden?”
“Partially, yes.”
“Braden and I aren’t even together right now, so I no longer have him.”
“He’s really into you, though,” Apple says. “And Addie knows it.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
The next morning I awake from thrashing dreams all night.
The cornfield. Running. The praying mantis. But I’m also running from the image of my mother and Mario in bed together. Naked.
The scarecrow. The pole.
The fear and pain when I hit it…
How could I have buried that memory?
How?
But the how doesn’t matter so much. I’m aware of it now, and though it hurts, it has a purpose to serve. I rise and start a pot of coffee. I have a phone call with Rosa at three—two her time. Before then, I need to do a Susie post…and I need to call Tessa. She hasn’t returned my call, and it’s time to work this out. I need her.
I scoff at myself. I need her.
I’m not wrong. I do need her, but maybe I should be focusing on her needs and not my own. This controlling part of my nature… Is it rooted in selfishness? In self-absorption? Man, something else to ask Rosa this afternoon.
I made a promise to myself yesterday that I’d let Braden have the space he requires concerning his past. That I’ll no longer ask.
Oh, yeah, it will be difficult, but I’m determined. He deserves the same respect he’s giving me.
And so does Tessa.
Yes, I need her, but this isn’t about me. It’s about her. And I know what to do.
I grab my phone and call her.
It goes to her voicemail, of course.
I exhale. “Hi, Tess, it’s me. Skye. I’m back home now, and I want you to know I’m here for you if you need me. I really want to work things out, but if you need space right now, I hear you. Feel free to call me. Or not. It’s up to you. But I’m here and I love you.”
I end the call, hoping the message comes across the way I mean it. I do need her, and I do want to work things out.
I also want to give her whatever time and distance she needs.
A few minutes later, though, my phone buzzes. A wide smile splits my face. “Tess?”
“Hi, Skye.” Her voice is…different. Tessa is usually so upbeat.
“I didn’t expect to hear from you quite so soon, but I’m so glad you called.”
A few seconds pass. Then, “I’m sorry.”
“No, Tessa. I’m sorry. I should have called you when Braden and I went to New York. Our shopping trip.”
“Yeah, you should have. But I should have told you it bugged me instead of brushing it off. That wasn’t fair.”
“I should have been there for you. With the whole Garrett situation. I’m sorry. More sorry.”